Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently helped your company organise an event at a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter:

– Provide details about the event
– Mention what you particularly liked about the hotel
– Suggest areas for improvement.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir / Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir/ Madam,

I am writting this letter to Inform you about the recent event organise in your hotel by our campany.

The eventb took place last week on Saturday in your estemed hotel.The event was held for our one of senior employe,on his retirement day.Around 40 colleagues attend this event. we booked a private hall,arranged a small get together and campany dinner to thank him for contributing in our campany and for his dedication towards his work in his entire job period.

I specially like the ambitious and welcoming nature of the staff as they lead our every guest very happly towards our venue.The hall was beautifully decorated, food was amazing and the service during food run was awesome. I appreicate the staff who arrange everything on time, which made the celebration memorable for everyone.

However,I would like to give you some suggestion on same areas of improvement needed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You provide relevant details about the retirement event, including that it was held on a Saturday, involved around 40 colleagues, and included a private hall and dinner. You also clearly identify what you appreciated, especially the staff’s welcome, the decoration, food, and service. However, the task is only partially addressed because the improvement section stops after “I would like to give you some suggestion” and does not name any specific area to improve. The letter also lacks a clear closing request or sign-off. To strengthen the response, explain one or two practical improvements, such as clearer directions to the hall or faster food service, and briefly state what you hope the manager will do.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a generally understandable order: it introduces the event, describes positive features, and then turns to possible improvements with “However.” This gives the reader a basic progression, and the event details are grouped together. Cohesion is less effective in places because the long opening paragraph combines several details without clear sentence boundaries, while the final paragraph announces suggestions but does not develop them. Some transitions and references are also awkward, such as “on same areas,” which makes the connection less clear. Use separate paragraphs for the event, praise, and suggestions, and connect each point with straightforward linking phrases. A complete final paragraph and a conventional sign-off would make the letter feel more finished.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of relevant vocabulary for a hotel event, including “private hall,” “retirement,” “dedication,” “decorated,” and “memorable.” These choices help communicate the occasion and your positive impression. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the message less natural, for example “writting,” “campany,” “happly,” and “food run.” Some expressions are also imprecise: “ambitious nature of the staff” does not clearly convey the welcoming service you describe, and “suggestion on same areas” is not idiomatic. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise phrases such as “attentive staff,” “food service,” and “areas for improvement” would suit a formal letter.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a sentence explaining why the dinner was held and a relative clause in “which made the celebration memorable.” However, grammatical control is uneven, and errors occur in verb forms, articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries. For example, “The event was held for our one of senior employe” has an incorrect noun phrase, while “Around 40 colleagues attend this event” needs a past-tense verb. The opening also contains a run-on sequence of event details, and “I specially like” does not maintain the past-time framing consistently. Practise forming accurate past-tense sentences and separating complete ideas with full stops. Proofreading for capitalisation and punctuation will also improve clarity.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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