Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-08-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The pie charts below show how working adults in a particular country spent their time in 1958 and 2008.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

* Note: these aren’t the original diagrams given in the test, they were recreated for the purpose of demonstration.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The pie charts illustrate how adults in a country who are employed spend their free time on different activities, in the year 1958 and 2008.

Overall, a large percentage of adults spend their time working, and this increased over the years, whereas, the amount of people that spend time with friends decreased throughout the period.

From the information provided, 33% of adults spent their time working in 1958, and this value increased to 42% in 2008. However, around 32% preferred sleeping and this percentage reduced to 25% in 2008. A marginal 2% of people travelled to work in 1958, this however appreciated to 7% in 2008.

Furthermore, the 8% of individuals who relaxed at home in 1958, surged to 13% in 2008. Hence, in 1958, 19% of adults preferred going out with family and friends, this depreciated to 6% in 2008. However, the percentage of working people who played sports in 1958 remained almost the same in 2008.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers the main features of the pie charts and makes relevant comparisons. You have successfully identified the key trends, such as the increase in working time and the decrease in time spent with friends. However, the report lacks a clear summary of the most significant changes, and the data presentation is somewhat mechanical. To reach a higher band, ensure that the overview highlights the most striking differences between the two years rather than just listing figures. Additionally, ensure all data points are accurate; for instance, you mentioned that sports remained 'almost the same', but you did not provide the specific figures to support this observation, which is necessary for a complete report.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'however', 'furthermore', and 'hence' to link ideas. However, some of these transitions feel slightly forced or are used incorrectly, such as 'hence' to introduce a new category of data. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the paragraphing could be more balanced. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus to enhance the flow of information.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrate', 'marginal', 'surged', and 'depreciated'. However, there are some issues with word choice and collocation. For example, 'appreciated' and 'depreciated' are financial terms and are not appropriate for describing changes in time allocation. Using 'increased' or 'decreased' is more accurate in this context. To achieve a higher score, focus on using vocabulary that is precisely suited to the context of statistical reporting and avoid using overly complex words if they do not fit the meaning perfectly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are some grammatical inaccuracies. For example, 'the amount of people' should be 'the number of people' (as people are countable). There are also some punctuation errors, such as the comma splice in '19% of adults preferred going out with family and friends, this depreciated to 6%'. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative clauses or conjunctions to join independent clauses, which will help you produce more error-free complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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