Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The pie charts below show how working adults in a particular country spent their time in 1958 and 2008.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

* Note: these aren’t the original diagrams given in the test, they were recreated for the purpose of demonstration.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The pie charts illustrates and compares the percentages of the day spent by working adults on various activities in 1958 and 2008.

In 2008, most of the adults spend their day while working the whole time. While, proportion lower than that spend their time by sleeping and relaxing at home. While activities like travelling to work and playing sports shares a similar proportion whereas,activity like going out with freinds and family shares a slightly lower proportion than travelling and playing.

In 1958, mostly adults spent their day by working and sleeping.However, Smaller proportion preferred to go out with their friends and family.Whereas fewer spent their day by travelling to work and relaxing at home.

In 1958,activities like working and sleeping comprised of 33% and 32%.While going out with family and friends at 12%.Moreover,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the two years and mention several relevant activities, including work, sleep, travel and socialising. However, the response only partially reports the chart: the 2008 figures are not given, and the final paragraph stops after an incomplete “Moreover,” leaving the comparison unfinished. There is also a factual error: going out with friends and family was 19% in 1958, not 12%. The overview is vague (“most of the adults spend their day while working the whole time”) and does not clearly summarise the main changes, such as work rising from 33% to 42% and socialising falling from 19% to 6%. The response is 17 words below the required minimum. Include an accurate overview and key figures for both years.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs for the introduction and each year, so there is an attempt to organise the information. However, ideas do not progress clearly from an overview to a structured comparison, and the two years are described separately rather than directly compared. Several linking words are used inaccurately or repetitively: “While” begins fragments, and “Whereas” does not connect a complete contrast. The final paragraph ends with “Moreover,” and no further information, which makes the response feel unfinished. Group the main increases and decreases into a clear comparison paragraph, use complete sentences, and ensure each paragraph develops one purpose. This would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant task vocabulary, including “percentages,” “proportion,” “comprised” and “activities,” and the reader can generally identify the categories being discussed. However, the range is limited and several expressions are imprecise or awkward, such as “spend their day while working the whole time” and “shares a similar proportion.” There are also spelling errors in “freinds” and “Smaller,” and the repeated use of “spent their day” makes the description less flexible. Choose concise chart language and use accurate activity labels, for example, “accounted for” or “represented.” Check spelling and collocations, and avoid wording that suggests adults worked all day when the chart shows only a percentage of their time.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some complex structures, including contrasts introduced with “While” and “Whereas,” but these are often incomplete or incorrectly punctuated. For example, “While, proportion lower than that spend their time by sleeping” lacks a clear subject and verb, while “Whereas fewer spent their day…” is also a fragment. There are errors in agreement and verb form in “The pie charts illustrates” and “most of the adults spend,” and sentence boundaries are inconsistent, as in “Sleeping.However” and “1958,activities.” These problems sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, tense consistency and punctuation before submitting.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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