Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Predictions Nov 2026 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many parts of the world, people are increasingly choosing Western-style clothes and wearing traditional dress less often than in the past. This change can be seen among people of different ages and backgrounds.

Why is this happening?

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many places all over the world,humans are preferring modern clothes over traditional dress.This change is being happening among varsetile group of people of distinct ages and backgrounds.

In my opinion,this is a negative development .In the era of modernization,dresses are also being replaced of old style clothes.But at the same time,in the name of modern clothes revealing clothes are being worn by women of different ages,which kind of disturbs the beauty of traditions.

Firstly,people now a days like to reveal their skin specially women by following modern social influencers or models which apparently doesn't make them look elegant,they are thirst of attention from social platforms ,it's built in them that if someone can show more skin or wear modern clothes they will feel more confident but it's actually the opposite,they are in a argue of social approval ,it feels like a competition that who can wear more revealing dresses and thus the beauty of traditional clothes are being lost.

Moreover,it also brings fake male attention,like i've known girls who have been physically assaulted over wearing revealing clothes ,it's important to know the difference between what's appropiate and what's not.Like if we take the example of asian women they look elegant even if they wear traditional costumes.it goes for males too,now a days men are also going for odd looking dresses in the name of modern clothes,it is ruining their vibes .

In the conclusion,as everything is becoming advanced,people's choice are changing too.But for dresses they are liking inappropiate clothings over old traditional wear to carry on with the advancement.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that the change is negative, and you offer reasons connected to social-media influence, confidence, and the loss of traditional clothing. The examples about Asian women and people you know also show an attempt to support your position. However, the task asks why people across different ages and backgrounds are choosing Western-style clothes; your explanation focuses mainly on women wearing revealing clothes and gives little attention to factors such as comfort, convenience, work, or global fashion trends. Some claims, including that revealing clothes reduce elegance or lead to assault, are asserted rather than carefully explained and do not fully establish why the broader change is negative. Develop a more balanced explanation of the causes and support your evaluation with clearer, relevant reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a stated opinion, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Connectors such as “Firstly” and “Moreover” help signal the sequence, and the main position remains broadly consistent. However, progression within the paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several claims are joined together without clear links—for example, the move from social-media influence to confidence, competition, and the loss of traditional clothing. The second body paragraph also shifts from assault to Asian clothing and then men’s fashion, so its central point becomes unclear. Use topic sentences that identify one main reason per paragraph, then explain and illustrate that reason in a logical order. Clearer referencing and more controlled sentence boundaries would also make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “modernization,” “social influencers,” “traditional costumes,” and “social approval.” This gives you some means of discussing fashion and social pressure. However, the range is limited by repeated general terms such as “modern clothes,” “traditional,” and “inappropriate,” while several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear: “varsetile group,” “they are thirst of attention,” “in a argue of social approval,” and “ruining their vibes.” Spelling and word-form errors, including “appropiate” and “inappropiate,” also reduce precision. Choose more exact expressions and check that words combine naturally. For instance, describe people as “seeking attention” or “competing for social approval,” rather than using the less natural phrases in the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, such as the sentence beginning “Firstly, people now a days like to reveal their skin.” This shows some effort to express connected ideas, but control is uneven: complex sentences often become run-ons, and errors can make relationships between ideas difficult to interpret. Examples include “This change is being happening,” “people's choice are changing,” and “they are in a argue,” which show problems with verb forms, agreement, and sentence construction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly where several clauses are joined by commas. Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea and a clearly attached explanation or example. Review subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries, then proofread for these patterns.

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