Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries not enough students are choosing to study science at university. What are the causes of this? What effects does it have on society?
Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
It is widely acknowledged that in this modern era greater count pupils is not interested in science and it is happening because of social media and it directly leads to medical issues.
To commence with, There are a myriad reasons that why students not choosing the science subject the predominant one is attraction towards social sites . To be more precise, academic studies want hundred percent concentration from learner and it is not possible because of entertainment apps because these sites shrink the brains of children and they do not want to study science. For instance, A survey conducted by 'Times of India ' published that after the revolution of technology the count of science student decline nearly 30%.
Furthermore, If the ratio of science pupil decline it directly affect the medical sector and numerous issues is revealed like space exploration will stop and economy of a country will down.
To sum up, Although it is happenin
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 157 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address the causes (social media) and effects (medical/economic issues), the arguments are underdeveloped and lack sufficient depth or supporting evidence. The conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence. Because the response is significantly under-length and the ideas are not fully extended, it does not meet the requirements for a higher band score. To improve, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations and examples to reach the required length.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'To commence with' and 'Furthermore' to signal structure. However, the logical progression is hindered by the incomplete nature of the text. Paragraphing is present, but the final paragraph is unfinished, which disrupts the overall flow. The relationship between ideas is sometimes unclear due to the brevity of the sentences. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that your ideas are fully developed before moving to the next point. Using a wider variety of linking words would also help improve the flow of your arguments.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'greater count pupils' and 'science subject' are somewhat unnatural. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'shrink the brains' and 'economy of a country will down', which are not standard academic collocations. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to discuss the topic with precision. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to education and societal development, and practice using these words in complete, grammatically correct sentences to ensure they are used in the right context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that impede clarity. Examples include 'greater count pupils is not interested', 'There are a myriad reasons that why students not choosing', and 'If the ratio of science pupil decline it directly affect'. These errors involve subject-verb agreement, missing auxiliary verbs, and incorrect sentence structure. The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading for these common errors is essential.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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