Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-07-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir,

I am writing with regard to a problem with a purchase that i made from your store last week, that i found damaged and i faced inconvenience while trying to return it back at store.

I visited at your location and bought this jacket without checking properly over there. While i came back at home my mother was eager to see it, and when she opened its packaging she said why there is hole at back of it that incident totally ruined my excitement. After looking it entirely hole was not only a problem, it has also a zip problem.

The moment i visited at your shop to return it was really makes me disappointed. Firstly, they did not put attention on me as I already informed at entrance i have a issue with a purchased items and after when i showed this to them they directly refused to return it.

I would like to suggest you kindly hold a group meeting of your employees regarding the customer service and remind them all about the procedure and precautions that already mentioned online should need to follow while employees dealing with their clients. Therefore, this issue can be handled properly.

I hope you will put attention on my suggestions.

Yours faithfully,

Bhagwant kaur.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.5

The letter covers all three bullet points required by the prompt. You described the damage (a hole and a faulty zip), explained the negative experience at the store, and provided a clear request for the manager to address staff training. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal complaint, although it occasionally slips into a more conversational style. The purpose of the letter is clear from the beginning, and the ideas are developed sufficiently to meet the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The letter is logically organized into paragraphs, each serving a distinct purpose. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'Firstly' and 'Therefore', to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing and some mechanical transitions. For example, the transition between the description of the damage and the store visit could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, but the use of pronouns and conjunctions could be more varied to improve the overall flow and readability of the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your message, such as 'inconvenience', 'merchandise', and 'precautions'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'put attention on me' instead of 'paid attention to me' and 'zip problem' instead of 'faulty zipper'. While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your writing. Expanding your range of collocations and formal expressions would help you achieve a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('a hole at back of it'), subject-verb agreement ('it has also a zip problem'), and tense consistency ('the moment i visited... was really makes me'). Additionally, there are issues with capitalization (the pronoun 'i' should always be capitalized) and punctuation. While the meaning remains clear, these persistent errors indicate a need for more careful proofreading and a better grasp of basic sentence construction.

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