Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently bought a jacket, but when you got home, you discovered it was
damaged. When you took it back to the store, you were told that merchandise
cannot be returned.

Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter:
• describe the problem with the jacket.
• explain what happened when you tried to return it.
• say what you would like the manager to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 5.0)

respected sir or mam

today i bought a jacket at your store when i check it at store it look good but when i got home and discovered was damaged i didnt do any thing with jacket it was also damaged but i was unable to check it properly when i took it back to the store you were told taht merchandise cannot be returned its my fault the jacket was damaged its my humble request to you return the jacket either change the jacket i will be thankfull to you at you this coperation may be its your policy you cannot take it back but you can change the jacket i am going to wrote the letter personaly kindly pay attention on my issue said your merchandise replace the jacket every brand have return and change policy so according to the policy you can replace the product if it will not be in good condition so kindly focuse on my issue

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The letter covers all three bullet points: describing the damage, explaining the store's refusal, and requesting a resolution. However, the development is quite limited and repetitive. The tone is inconsistent, shifting between formal and informal, and the lack of clear paragraphing makes the structure feel rushed. While the purpose of the letter is clear, the ideas are not fully extended, and the argument for a return/exchange is somewhat circular. To improve, you should structure your letter into clear paragraphs for each point and use a more professional tone throughout to better persuade the manager.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response lacks paragraphing entirely, which is a significant issue for a formal letter. Ideas are presented in a single block of text, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of your argument. There is a lack of cohesive devices; sentences are often linked by simple conjunctions or run-on structures, such as 'its my fault the jacket was damaged its my humble request'. To achieve a higher band, you must use clear paragraph breaks for each section of the task and incorporate a wider range of linking words like 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'however' to improve the flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying on simple words like 'good', 'damaged', and 'change'. There are several spelling errors, such as 'thankfull', 'coperation', 'personaly', and 'focuse', which distract the reader. The phrasing is often unnatural, for example, 'I didnt do any thing with jacket' or 'I am going to wrote the letter personaly'. To improve, you should focus on using more precise vocabulary related to retail and customer service, such as 'defective', 'policy', 'exchange', and 'refund', and ensure you proofread for basic spelling accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The grammar is weak, characterized by frequent run-on sentences and a lack of punctuation. There are consistent errors in verb tense and subject-verb agreement, such as 'when i check it... it look good' instead of 'when I checked it... it looked good'. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and the lack of capitalization at the beginning of sentences and for the pronoun 'I' is a persistent issue. To improve, you need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and pay close attention to punctuation and capitalization.

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