Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Predictions Nov 2026 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The table below shows the percentages of male and female workers across five employment sectors in 2012 and 2022.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The table illustrates the precentages of male and female employeed working in five multiple employment sectors in 2012 and 2022.

Overall, men consistantly accounted for the largest proportion of employees in the construction and manufacturing, whereas women dominated the retail, education and health and social care.

Looking first at male employment, construction has the highest proportion of male worker, although their share declined from 94% in 2012 to 90% in 2022.

Similarly the percentage of men employed in manufacturing fell from 78% to 72%. A downfall continued on retail and education, where male representation decreased from 48% to 45% and from 31% to 28%. In consrast, the proportion of male employees in health and social care increased from 18% to 22%.

Regarding female employment, the highest figures were recorded in health and social care along with slightly drop from 82% to 78%. Women's representation in education increased from 69% to 72%. while figure of retail also increased from 52% to 55%. Similarly, the proportions of female workers in manufacturing and construction climbed from 22% to 28% and deom 6% to 10%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You cover the table’s main patterns accurately: men have the largest shares in construction and manufacturing, while women lead in the other three sectors. The overview is clear, and the body supports it with relevant figures, including the declines in male representation in construction and manufacturing and the rise in women’s share there. You also identify the contrasting increase in men’s share of health and social care. This gives the report a well-supported account of the key comparisons. To make the selection more precise, avoid broad wording such as “the highest figures” without specifying that this refers to women, and make the overall changes across the two years explicit in the overview rather than leaving most detail to the body.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a concise overview, and separate paragraphs for male and female employment. The progression from sector comparisons to the corresponding figures is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Similarly,” “In contrast,” and “Regarding” help signal relationships. This is a coherent arrangement, though some connections are mechanical or imperfect. For example, “A downfall continued on retail and education” is an awkward transition, and the sentence beginning “Regarding female employment” combines a comparison with an unclear phrase, “along with slightly drop.” The full stop before “while figure of retail” also interrupts the flow. Use more natural transitions and check punctuation so the links between sentences remain smooth.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “proportion,” “representation,” “dominated,” and “declined,” and these choices generally communicate the comparisons clearly. There are also attempts at more varied phrasing, such as “the highest proportion” and “accounted for the largest proportion.” However, several inaccurate word choices, collocations, and spelling errors reduce precision: “precentages,” “employeed,” “multiple employment sectors,” “downfall,” “consrast,” and “deom.” “A downfall continued on retail” is not a natural way to describe a decrease, while “five multiple employment sectors” is redundant. Aim for accurate, conventional reporting language and proofread spelling; this would make the vocabulary more flexible and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including a contrast clause in “although their share declined” and a relative clause in “where male representation decreased.” Most figures and comparisons remain understandable. However, some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships unclear. In “construction has the highest proportion of male worker,” the singular noun does not fit the general statement; “Regarding female employment, the highest figures were recorded … along with slightly drop” lacks a grammatical connection; and “while figure of retail also increased” is missing an article and has faulty sentence punctuation after “72%.” Tense use also shifts between present (“has”) and past (“declined,” “increased”) when describing data from 2012 and 2022. Use consistent past forms and revise sentence boundaries and clause structure.

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