Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You have decided to look for a new job.

Write a letter to a friend. In your letter
• explain why you are looking for a new job.
• describe the kind of job you would like to have.
• ask your friend to help you find a job

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear _________,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Hilary,

I am writing to you to see if you have any good recommendation of logistics sales job which is a uncapped commission based since you have been in this industry for so many years and you have many friends who are also in this industry.

The reason why I am looking for new job is to plan for better retirement while I am still have the energy to work hard. Recently I fell sick and admitted to hospital for some weeks. I have been working in the current company for about 20 years. This is a good company which I could have a stable work life balance. But I couldn't get high income. Hence, I am looking for job which I can decide the paycheck figure.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses all three bullet points: explaining the reason for leaving, describing the desired job, and asking for help. However, the letter is significantly under the 150-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the development of ideas. The explanation regarding the desire for higher income is clear, but the description of the job is somewhat repetitive, and the request for help is integrated into the opening sentence rather than being a distinct, well-developed part of the letter. To improve, you must expand on your ideas to meet the length requirement, providing more detail about your professional background or the specific type of logistics role you are seeking.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into two paragraphs, which is a logical structure for this task. However, the flow between ideas is somewhat mechanical. The transition between the opening request and the explanation of your current situation is abrupt. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Hence' and 'But', the overall progression of ideas feels a bit disjointed. To improve, ensure that your sentences are linked more naturally and that you use a wider variety of cohesive devices to connect your thoughts, rather than relying on simple sentence structures.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision expected at higher bands. You use some industry-specific terms like 'logistics sales' and 'uncapped commission', which is good. However, there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'decide the paycheck figure' and 'admitted to hospital for some weeks'. These phrases are understandable but not entirely natural. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and idiomatic expressions that are appropriate for a letter to a friend, while also ensuring your word choices are precise and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There are several grammatical errors that affect the clarity of your writing. For instance, 'while I am still have the energy' should be 'while I still have the energy', and 'I am looking for job' is missing an article ('a job'). Additionally, 'admitted to hospital' should be 'admitted to the hospital'. Your sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited attempts at complex sentences. To improve, focus on correcting basic errors in verb tense and article usage, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex sentence structures to demonstrate better control over English grammar.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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