Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You let a friend stay at your apartment while you were away on a trip. When you returned home, you discovered that a valuable possession was broken.

Write a letter to your friend. In your letter
• describe the broken possession.
• explain why it is important to you.
• explain what you would like your friend to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear _________,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Aman,

I am writing a letter regarding my broken possession. As you know, You spend three weeks in my apartment. Furthermore, today, i Came back home, i was happy my house was neat and clean but when i go to my room in my drawer , i found out my watch was broken not only but also, the chain is missed. The mirror come out from the watch.

Moving towards, this watch is precious for me. My grandmother gave me on my birthday, because it was cultural watch, according to our tradition, every generation pass this watch to another, unfourantely, i lost my hope, therefore my family tradition ends with it.

I am feeling emotional now, i want you to give you responsibility, you need to visit cultural store to find same watches , include all are area and if you cannot find it, get information from where i can repair my watch.

your faithfully

Juila

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points: describing the watch, explaining its sentimental value, and requesting action. However, the tone is somewhat inconsistent and occasionally aggressive, which is not ideal for a letter to a friend. The explanation of the watch's importance is clear, but the request for the friend to visit a 'cultural store' and 'include all area' is slightly unclear and lacks the natural phrasing expected in a personal letter. The ideas are relevant, but the development could be more nuanced to better reflect the relationship between the writer and the recipient.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The letter is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the narrative. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused. For example, 'Moving towards' is an inappropriate transition for this context, and 'not only but also' is used incorrectly in the first paragraph. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the lack of smooth transitions between sentences makes the writing feel somewhat disjointed. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the vague instruction to 'include all are area'.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and contains several errors that occasionally impede clarity. Phrases like 'cultural watch' and 'the mirror come out' are non-standard. There is an attempt to use more complex vocabulary, but the word choice is often inaccurate, such as 'missed' instead of 'missing' and 'unfourantely' (spelling error). The range is sufficient to convey the basic message, but the lack of precision and frequent errors in word formation and collocation prevent a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('You spend' instead of 'You spent'), tense inconsistencies ('i Came back'), and punctuation errors. The sentence 'not only but also, the chain is missed' is grammatically incorrect. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction is a significant feature of the writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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