Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-09-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You let a friend stay at your apartment while you were away on a trip. When you returned home, you discovered that a valuable possession was broken.

Write a letter to your friend. In your letter
• describe the broken possession.
• explain why it is important to you.
• explain what you would like your friend to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear _________,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Ravinder

I hope you are doing well.I am writing this letter to inform you that when I was reached at my appartment i found my most valuable aquarium was broken.

After coming back from a trip i was very exhausted as soon as I opened the door of the my house I found my aquarium was completly broken and all the fishes and dolphins were fell on the floor some of them were already died.

My grandfather gifted me that aquarium .So it was very precious for me and as well as for my father also . I dont know how i will explain this to my father because it is the last thing that we have as a memory of my grandfather.

I want to meet you please come as soon as possible. I want you to tell my father about this incident that was happened. And i also want the fishes who are still alive bring a new aquarium for them.

I hope you will understand my situation and help me.

Yours lovingly

Anu

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points of the task: describing the broken item, explaining its importance, and stating what you would like your friend to do. The tone is appropriate for a letter to a friend, although the content regarding the 'dolphins' in an aquarium is logically confusing and detracts from the realism of the situation. The ideas are generally clear, but the development could be more sophisticated. To improve, ensure that the details provided are realistic and logically consistent to better support your narrative.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the narrative. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite limited and sometimes mechanical. For example, the transition between sentences is often abrupt, and there is a lack of varied linking words to connect ideas smoothly. The punctuation is inconsistent, particularly with missing spaces after periods, which affects the flow of the text. Improving the use of transition signals and ensuring consistent paragraphing will help elevate your score in this area.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to communicate your message, such as 'exhausted', 'precious', and 'incident'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'fishes and dolphins were fell on the floor' and 'already died'. These errors occasionally hinder the clarity of your writing. To achieve a higher band, focus on using more precise vocabulary and ensuring that your word choices are contextually appropriate. Additionally, be mindful of basic spelling and word form errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

Your writing shows a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including issues with verb tense ('when I was reached', 'that was happened'), subject-verb agreement, and missing articles ('the my house'). Punctuation is also a significant issue, with several instances of missing spaces after full stops and incorrect capitalization. While these errors do not completely prevent communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for punctuation will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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