Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You let a friend stay at your apartment while you were away on a trip. When you returned home, you discovered that a valuable possession was broken.

Write a letter to your friend. In your letter
• describe the broken possession.
• explain why it is important to you.
• explain what you would like your friend to do.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear _________,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Ram,

I hope your health is good.I am writing this letter to inform you about a thing which you broke in my house when i was on trip.

Firstly, the thing which you broke in my house is computer. You broke the screen of the computer and the mouse with this i can not do my office work on computer and all my work are pending.

Secondly, the computer is very important for me because it was gifted by my brother on my 18th birthday. This gift feels me very happy and our brother bond will be increased.So this was the precious gift for me .

Furthermore, I would like from you that you should arrange half money for reparing for my computer as soon as possible.With this I can regular on my work also keep our bond strong and happy in our life.

I hope your family is good and keep in touch.

Yours lovingy,

Mridul Sandal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address all three required points: you identify the computer and its damaged screen and mouse, explain its sentimental value as a birthday gift from your brother, and ask Ram to contribute half the repair cost. The purpose is clear and the details are relevant. The explanation of why the computer matters is stronger emotionally than practically, while the request could be more specific about how Ram should arrange payment or respond. Some phrasing also makes the circumstances unclear—for example, “you broke” sounds like a definite accusation, although you do not explain how you know what happened. The letter already covers the task well; clearer, more fully developed details and a tactful, explicit request would make it more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The letter has a coherent overall arrangement: an opening, separate paragraphs about the damage and its importance, a request, and a closing. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Furthermore” help the reader follow the points, and the main message remains understandable. However, these transitions feel somewhat mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. For instance, “With this I can regular on my work also keep our bond strong” combines the practical and personal reasons without clearly showing how they connect. The closing also shifts abruptly from the repair request to asking about the friend’s family. Use more natural transitions and make each paragraph’s ideas connect smoothly to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main situation, including “screen,” “mouse,” “office work,” “gifted,” and “precious gift.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations sound unnatural, sometimes making the meaning less clear. Examples include “a thing which you broke,” “This gift feels me very happy,” and “arrange half money for reparing.” These expressions suggest the intended meaning but are not natural English phrasing. Aim for precise everyday language suited to a personal letter, such as naming the item directly and using established phrases for damage, sentimental value, and sharing repair costs. Check spelling and word forms as well, particularly “repairing” and “lovingly.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response communicates its main ideas, but grammatical control is uneven. Most sentences follow simple patterns, and attempts to combine ideas sometimes produce faulty structures, as in “the mouse with this i can not do my office work” and “This gift feels me very happy.” There are also errors in articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries: “is computer,” “all my work are pending,” and “good.I am” need correction. Capitalisation of “I” is inconsistent, and the final request would benefit from a complete, clearly structured sentence. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses using patterns such as “because” and “which.” More reliable punctuation and agreement would make the letter easier to read.

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