Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In recent years, some people believe to improve child's development they need to watch television programmes, and other poeple disagree. It has become an increasingly important issue. This essay will discuss maily about why I totaly disagree with it.
To begin with, people who believe watching TV shows improves development but these kids usually are isolated and more often harder to understand some basic mathmatical problems. This is because they are having lack of focus, and msotly do not want to listen to their parents. For example, Infants are being influneced to watcgh those cartoons so thier mother can focus on some essential things and father being busy at work. These visuals of high contrast colours affects the brain. Where they are deeply attracted just like being addicted to it. Therefore, these results on being stubborn increases when they can't resist it at all, due to which conflict arises between parents and the kids.
On the other hand, infants who were never introduced to the electronic devices are mostly attached with their parents and surroundings. This is the area where they grab the details by observing it and trying to understand along with communicating with their parents. Parents also purchase some advanced toys which helps their kids in improving their motor skills. In addition, development of the toddlers are beings improved through affection which also increases self awareness. For instance, these toys which upgrades the level of interaction where parents communicate with their kids the whole idea about creating a complex toy is that parents get involved with the kids so this makes them to be more open and understand eachother and that leads to have a good bonding between them. As a result, this creates a happy enviornment and most probably no one is interested in watching the television programmes and ofcourse it helps in moding them in a better human being in future.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I disagree that watching TV programmes can lead to improve their kids. Overall, I believe that kids wiith less influced with the programmes are more involved in commuincating with thier parents or teachers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age. However, the essay focuses entirely on the impact of television programmes on child development. Because the response fails to address the specific task requirements, it cannot be assessed as a relevant answer to the prompt provided. While the student maintains a consistent position regarding television, this does not satisfy the requirements of the task question regarding preschool education.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, the logical progression is hindered by the fact that the content does not relate to the prompt. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical. While the structure of an essay is present, the lack of relevance to the topic makes the overall coherence difficult to follow in the context of the requested task.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors such as 'maily', 'totaly', 'msotly', 'influneced', 'watcgh', 'thier', 'enviornment', and 'moding'. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to express basic ideas, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. The student relies on simple phrasing, and the misuse of words like 'moding' (likely meaning molding) further detracts from the quality of the lexical resource.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'some people believe to improve child's development they need to watch television', 'they are having lack of focus', and 'development of the toddlers are beings improved'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction limits the score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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