Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school. these all possibilities depends on mindset of the student parents because some parents thought if there children will join the preschool so there mind will be sharp and fast rather then the student whos parent did not want his child to join preschool his min will not much fast as compared to the child whos parent forced him to join the preschool.

(advantages)

. the main reason is the mind the children mind will open and will able to understand the situation rapidly .

. when he will join the school he will find easy because his mind will be trained in preschool it is his benefit and his parents .

(disadvantages)

we can not say that there are disadvantages not to join the preschool it will be difficult for the children only .

. the main disadvantage is that his mind will not that much fast as the student who join preschool .

.And he will take time to reach the level of that student his mind will slow .

In my opinion it will better to send your children to preschool it will be better your child will be able to answer quickly and is better for his future and if you not want to send it will not dangerous it will only difficult for the child but it will be recover with the time .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of preschool. However, the development of ideas is very limited and repetitive. The arguments regarding 'mindset' and 'sharpness' are not supported by clear examples or logical reasoning, and the essay relies on informal, fragmented bullet points rather than a cohesive essay structure. The position is clear, but the lack of depth and the reliance on simplistic assertions prevent the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, you should expand on your points with specific examples, such as social development or academic preparation, and ensure the essay follows a standard paragraph structure.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The essay lacks a logical structure. The use of bullet points and headings like '(advantages)' and '(disadvantages)' is inappropriate for an IELTS essay, which requires formal paragraphing. There is a lack of cohesive devices; sentences are often linked by simple repetition rather than logical connectors. The progression of ideas is disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. To improve, you must use formal paragraphing (introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion) and incorporate linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', and 'on the other hand' to connect your ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive, often relying on simple words like 'mind', 'fast', and 'good'. There are significant issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'his min will not much fast' and 'it will be recover'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas, and the frequent errors in word formation and spelling hinder the clarity of the message. To improve, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to education and child development, and practice using synonyms to avoid repeating the same words throughout your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammar is characterized by frequent errors in sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and punctuation. Many sentences are run-on or fragmented, such as 'these all possibilities depends on mindset of the student parents'. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the basic sentences used often contain errors that impede communication. The misuse of articles and pronouns is consistent throughout the text. To improve, you need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and work on using punctuation correctly to separate distinct ideas.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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