Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-08-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Education is a fundamental right of each and every individual. There are some disputes related to what age children should be enrolled into school. Some people sent their children around three or four years of age, while others wait until their children are old and wise enough to join primary school. There are many advantages and disadvantages related to sent children in such a young age to attend preschool.
To start with, the major disadvantage is lake of overall personality development. For example, preschools are quite strict regarding the behaviour of individual children so, children have to act certain ways or they will get punishments, indeed it would be at minor level but still the children develop fear in very young age related to punishment which hamper their personality development. If parents wait then they can give a warmth of heart to their children and it help young individual to undrerstand self of belongingness. It will eventually help in the personality development, children can express themselves better way.
Another disadvantage is it will break a bond between children and parents eventually as they start staying outside of the home without their parents at very early age. For instance, in many cases children stop taking any opinion or commond given by parents as they get used to get them by their teachers. Also, sometimes they maintain strict distance with their parents as a result, lack of emotional bond.
In addition, childhood is one of the best stages of children's life, it must be enjoyable not be a stressful. For expressing the natural behaviour, it is wise if children stay with their parents more as there is a big education system waiting for them for one or two decades.
In conclusion, indeed parents have rights to take decision regarding what age their young ones should be attend preschool but while making the decision some factors like, children's personality development, parents-children bond, must take in consideration.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of preschool. However, the essay is unbalanced; it focuses almost exclusively on the disadvantages, with only a brief, vague mention of the benefits of staying home. The prompt asks for a discussion of both, but the 'advantages' of preschool are entirely omitted. While the position is clear, the development of ideas is limited by this one-sided approach. To reach a higher band, you must ensure that both sides of the argument are explored with equal depth and supported by specific examples or logical reasoning.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is a logical progression from one point to the next. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'To start with', 'Another disadvantage', 'In addition'). Additionally, some referencing is unclear, such as the phrase 'get them by their teachers' in the third paragraph, which lacks a clear antecedent. While the overall flow is coherent, the range of linking words could be more varied and sophisticated to improve the flow between sentences.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'lake of overall personality' (lack), 'sent children' (sending), and 'undrerstand self of belongingness' (sense of belonging). Some phrasing is quite simplistic, such as 'big education system'. To improve, you should focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensure that your spelling is accurate, as errors like 'commond' (command) and 'undrerstand' (understand) detract from the professional tone of the essay.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'Some people sent their children' should be 'send', and 'it help young individual' should be 'helps young individuals'. There are also issues with article usage and subject-verb agreement throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for basic tense consistency and pluralisation to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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