Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowadays some people believe that the children are going to the playway school in age three or four. This is particulary significant impact on the children affecting in the mind. Some people believe the primary school before the send them to school. There are several advantages and disadvantages upcoming paragraphs, there are light of prinicipal factors can be drawn.

one of the primary resion is that, few people think the age three to four the age is play to games and there are not stress in the studay. This is evident from the fact that in the growth. For instance, some people think that the age three and four going to the school there are pressure in the study and there are not growing to faster because children are stress in the home work. Moreover same children are not proper eating because there are stress in the work.

One the other hand, some people are waiting for the old enough for the primary School because children are more adult there are focuse in the study and there are happy to going school and enjoy the freinds company. To illustrate, the teacher is read the topic and children are silent and there are fully focus on the studay and oass out with good grades. One significant of the primary school stidants are late to the pass out gve study and there are late to graduate.

in conclusion, although preschool children early to learn study and the other hand primary school children are late pass out the school.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response recognises the topic and attempts to discuss both early preschool and waiting until primary school, so it is relevant in broad terms. However, the advantages and disadvantages are not clearly identified or balanced: the first body paragraph mainly describes possible stress and effects on eating, while the second focuses on older children being more focused and social. These points are difficult to interpret and are not explained with clear reasons or a developed example. The introduction also does not establish a clear position, and the conclusion merely repeats that preschool children learn early while primary pupils graduate later. To strengthen the response, state the benefits and drawbacks directly, explain how each affects children, and support them with a specific, relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and phrases such as “For instance,” “Moreover” and “On the other hand” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the progression within paragraphs is often unclear: the first body paragraph moves from play and stress to growth and eating without showing how these points connect. Some linking phrases do not accurately express the relationship between ideas, and references such as “there” and “same children” are unclear. The conclusion also does not bring the discussion together. Organise each paragraph around one clear advantage or disadvantage, then use simple, accurate links and explicit references to make the reasoning easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The writer attempts topic-related vocabulary, including “preschool,” “primary school,” “pressure,” “home work,” “grades” and “graduate.” However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice problems make several ideas difficult to understand. Examples include “particulary,” “resion,” “studay,” “focuse” and “oass out.” Some expressions are also unnatural, such as “playway school,” “there are light of prinicipal factors” and “pass out with good grades.” Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing early education, such as “social development,” “academic pressure” and “school readiness,” and check spelling and collocations carefully. Clear, familiar vocabulary used accurately would communicate more effectively than ambitious but unclear phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and longer sentence forms, including a contrast introduced by “although” and examples introduced by “For instance” and “To illustrate.” However, sentence structures are often incomplete or inaccurately formed, which frequently obscures the intended meaning. For example, “some people believe the primary school before the send them to school” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “children are more adult there are focuse in the study” joins ideas without a correct clause relationship. There are also recurring problems with articles, agreement and verb forms, as in “the teacher is read the topic.” Practise building complete subject–verb sentences first, then combine them with accurate conjunctions and clauses; check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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