Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Barron's Writing · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.
Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Good day everyone i would like you to know my ideas regarding this particular problem , the parents sending thier children to school as early as much they can .

i will tell you my opinion regarding with this matter base on my past experiences .

for me some of the advantages of sending the children with young ages to school is first having a new environment not just environment , friendly environment i will have a lot of new friend despite being the youngest and learning new things as early as you can , you have a new friends you can play everyday , you can discover new things you can activate your early talent discover it and improve it thats all for my advantage and the things i dont want in an at early age you will go to school is force things happen thats new for you , you must sleep early at night and wake up early in the morning its kinda boring daily routine but it will change if you are in the school sudden things change shift things in an instance , totally it is more reasonable to go to shool at early age than waiting for the right timing or age that time your mind is prepare for the new changes and challenges in life where all things started where dreams begun you should prepare yourself in everything might just happen , overall going to school is exciting and more fun it is unexplainable enjoyment side of life

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address the topic by giving advantages, such as making friends, learning early, and discovering talents, and disadvantages, including having to follow an early sleep-and-wake routine. However, the discussion is uneven: the benefits are listed rather than explained, and the disadvantage is mainly about routine rather than the broader challenges of starting school young. Your view that early schooling is “more reasonable” is present, but it is not clearly developed or balanced against the drawbacks. The opening also frames the response as a personal address rather than directly introducing the issue. To strengthen the response, explain how each point affects a child and support it with a specific example, while making your position clear throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic sequence from an introduction to advantages, disadvantages, and a concluding opinion, so the reader can identify the main topics. However, the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and much of the response runs together in one long sequence. Connections such as “first,” “but,” and “overall” are attempted, but they do not consistently show how one point relates to the next. The shift from making friends and discovering talents to daily routines is abrupt, and several ideas are repeated. Use separate paragraphs for the introduction, benefits, drawbacks, and conclusion; then use clear linking phrases and refer back to the central question to create a more coherent progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “new environment,” “new friends,” “talent,” and “routine,” and the reader can generally understand the intended ideas. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, such as “new things” and “things change.” Some word choices and forms also make the meaning less natural, including “young ages” and “activate your early talent.” Spelling errors such as “thier” and “shool” further reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise language about early education, social development, and adjustment, and check spelling and collocations. This would make your points clearer without requiring unusually advanced vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to express several connected ideas and includes some longer sentence forms, but sentence control is weak. Many clauses are joined without clear punctuation, as in the extended sentence beginning “for me some of the advantages,” which makes relationships between ideas difficult to follow. There are also frequent errors in articles, plurals, agreement, and verb forms, for example “a lot of new friend,” “you have a new friends,” and “your mind is prepare.” Capitalisation and sentence boundaries are inconsistent as well. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine related ideas using accurate conjunctions. Careful editing for subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation would improve clarity.

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