Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Numerous food and beverage can cause serious health problem due to high amount of sugar. Products that contains high sugar should not be pocket friendly to mitigate the consumption. I largely agree because it cause serious health problems and eating natural food is much cheaper.
Sugary products can cause many health problems such as diabetes, high cholestrol level, and kidney failures. Because of the fast paced life individuals are neglecting physical fitness and by consuming processed food in large amount it makes it even worse. For example, most diabetic people are reported in USA because of the huge serving size of meals and people living there has developed a sweeth tooth. By rising the price of food products, and encouraging a healthy life style will play a pivotal role in reducing the consumption of sugary products.
These products are not detrimental for health when took in right quantity, but unfortunately controlling food craving is hard for kids and it weakens their immune sytem badly. Furthermore, by increaing the price of the sugary products, young people will automatically transition for a healthy lifestyle and would start saving money. Over consumption of sugary products increase body weight of an individual and several medicines are use for droping the body weight which can cause heart attack if not taken in right dose.
Overall, sugary products can cause serious health problems and by rising the price of the sugary products natural lifestyle will be promoted.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear from the introduction: you largely agree that sugary products should cost more, and the conclusion restates this view. You give relevant reasons, including health risks and the idea that higher prices could encourage healthier choices. However, some points are asserted rather than explained. For instance, the claim that natural food is cheaper is not developed with an example, and the discussion of children’s cravings and weight-loss medicines does not clearly show how price increases would address these problems. The reference to diabetes in the USA is also broad and unsupported. The response is 9 words below the required minimum, so it does not meet the task’s length requirement. Develop each main reason with a clear explanation or specific example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The main ideas are generally grouped by topic, and linking expressions such as “For example,” “Furthermore,” and “Overall” help signal relationships. However, progression within the body paragraphs is sometimes unclear. The second paragraph moves from health effects to lifestyle and then to price without fully connecting these points; the third similarly shifts from children’s cravings to savings and weight-loss medicines. Some references, such as “it” in “it makes it even worse,” are not fully clear. To strengthen organisation, give each paragraph one central reason, explain it in sequence, and use linking phrases to show the precise relationship between claims rather than simply adding another point.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “processed food,” “consumption,” “immune system,” and “lifestyle,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “play a pivotal role.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “pocket friendly” does not express the intended meaning clearly, “sweeth tooth” is misspelled, and “droping the body weight” is not idiomatic. Spelling errors such as “cholestrol,” “increaing,” and “sytem” also reduce control. Aim to learn common word partnerships for this topic and check spelling carefully; more precise phrasing will make your argument sound clearer and more academic.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a subordinate clause in “because it cause serious health problems” and a contrast structure beginning “These products are not detrimental…”. The overall meaning is usually clear, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “Products that contains” and “Over consumption … increase,” and incorrect verb forms in “when took in right quantity” and “medicines are use.” There are also problems with articles and plural forms, as in “high amount of sugar” and “serious health problem.” These errors do not usually prevent understanding, but they make sentences less accurate. Review agreement, articles, and passive verb forms, then proofread each sentence for a complete and correctly formed clause.
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