Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many factory produced food and drinks products contain high levels of sugar, which as a result causes many health problems. Sugar products should be made more costly to encourage individuals to consume less sugar. In my view, this statement is flawed.

On the one hand, it is understandable why some individuals would agree with this view. Firstly, increasing the price of sugary products will help reduce excess sugar intake by people and will Increase healthy living. Reducing the amount of sugar intake by people will increase the health standards, and reduce health problems like diabetes, eye problem and tooth decay. This will also result into healthy eating, and people minding the kind of product they consume. The government will tackle less sugar related problems, as a result of this control. Less patients will suffer from the above mentioned illnesses, and will reduce the loss of life due to excessive sugar in the blood.

The high levels of sugars in many product does not automatically cause health problems for consumers, however, the excessive intake of the product is what causes heath challenges for people. Low blood sugar, is one health problem which leads to dizziness, fatigue and possible death. Athletes are required to consume high sugary content during workouts to replenish lost energy, and if these are made expensive, some athelets cant afford them. Business fallouts, if companies that produce sugary produced are forced to make their products expensive, their sales will drop, as peoople cant buy them anymore and the company might go bankrupt overtime due to lack of sales.

In conclusion, The health problems caused by sugar intake is not entirely based on the product, but the excessive intake by consumers. Sugar is beneficial in both ways.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you disagree with making sugary products more expensive, and you address both the possible health benefit of higher prices and reasons against the policy. The point that excessive consumption, rather than sugar’s mere presence, creates risks is relevant, as is your example of athletes needing energy. However, some support is under-developed or unclear. The claim that low blood sugar is a consequence of sugary products being expensive is not explained, and the possible effect on businesses is asserted without evidence or detail. The conclusion that sugar is beneficial “in both ways” also does not clearly restate your position. Develop each main reason with a clearer explanation and a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph presenting the opposing view, a paragraph giving your objections, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “On the one hand,” “however,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the argument. However, the progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the first body paragraph moves from health benefits to government costs and mortality, while the second shifts from sugar intake to low blood sugar, athletes, and company sales. Some links are mechanical or unclear, including “This will also result into” and “as a result of this control.” Group related points more tightly, use clearer references, and make the conclusion follow directly from the reasons presented.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “excessive intake,” “tooth decay,” “replenish lost energy,” and “bankrupt,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “health standards” and “sugar-related problems.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, for example “factory produced food and drinks products,” “healthy living,” and “result into.” Spelling errors such as “heath,” “athelets,” and “peoople” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more natural combinations and check spelling carefully; precise wording will make your argument easier to understand and more convincing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in the opening and conditional structures such as “if these are made expensive.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “The high levels of sugars in many product does” has a plural subject with a singular verb and an incorrect noun form, while “Less patients” and “the health problems … is” show agreement problems. The sentence beginning “Business fallouts, if companies…” is also not formed as a complete, clear sentence. Review subject–verb agreement, articles and plurals, and punctuate sentence openings consistently. More accurate control of these patterns would strengthen the complex sentences you are attempting.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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