Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Most of the industrial products like food and drink consists high level of glucose, which results in various health problems. So, some people believe that the price of sugary products should be made high to discourage people to take more sugar. I completely disagree and opine that price of sugary items should not be raised to decrease its consumption.

Sugar is contained in many products. Though, sugar causes many health probmems, many individual consume it in a daily baiss. One of the main reason behind this is the lack of awareness redarding the detrimental effects of sugary products in human health. For instance, if a person consumes sugar everyday in form of chocolates, biscuits, sweets and tea, it gradually affects the human health, at last diabetes and high blood pressure are seen. So, First of all, mass awareness campaign need to be conducted to educate community people about the effects of high sugar consumption in health. Likewiswe, people need to limit the use of manufactured food and drinks in home so that it will consumed in less quantity. For instance, if there is no such products, people subconsiously forget to eat it, if it is not available in home.

In contrast, if the price of sugary items is increased, the consumption of sugar may not be reduced. This is because, if people are not aware about its consequences, then the price of any product cannot stop its usuage. For example, during COVID-19 pandemic, price of almost every product was increased but the consumption wasnot reduced. So, price maynot influence sugar consumption.

To conclude, sugar is contained in many manufactured product, high price maynot influence sugar consumption. However, awareness regarding its harmful effects like diabetes and limitig those products in home may encourage people to consume less sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you disagree that sugary products should be made more expensive. You address the issue and offer relevant alternatives, especially public awareness campaigns and limiting sugary products at home. The explanation that people may continue consuming products if they do not understand the health risks supports your view. However, some ideas are less fully developed than others. The COVID-19 comparison is broad and does not clearly show that higher prices would fail to reduce sugar consumption specifically. The conclusion repeats your main points but does not add a final, well-supported reason. To strengthen the response, explain more directly why price increases would be ineffective or unfair, and develop a specific example linking your alternative measures to reduced consumption.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, the body paragraphs present reasons, and the conclusion restates your view. Ideas generally progress from the health effects of sugar to awareness and then to the limits of price increases. Linking phrases such as “For instance,” “In contrast,” and “To conclude” help guide the reader. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. “Though” at the start of the second paragraph does not fit smoothly with the following sentence, and “So” introduces a recommendation without fully connecting it to the preceding explanation. The reference in “if there is no such products” is also unclear. Use more precise links between claims and examples, and make sure each paragraph develops one central point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “detrimental effects,” “mass awareness campaign,” “consumption,” and “consequences,” which helps communicate the topic and your argument. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, limiting precision. For example, “industrial products” is not the natural term for manufactured food, “take more sugar” is awkward, and “influence sugar consumption” is less precise than wording about reducing consumption. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “probmems,” “baiss,” “redarding,” and “subconsiously.” These do not prevent understanding, but they weaken control. Build accuracy by learning common topic collocations and checking spelling, while varying repeated terms such as “products” and “sugar.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if people are not aware about its consequences” and a concession beginning “Though.” The main ideas remain understandable, but errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “products … consists” has a plural subject with a singular verb, while “many individual consume” and “campaign need to be conducted” also show agreement problems. In “if there is no such products,” the demonstrative and noun do not agree. Some sentences are awkwardly joined, and punctuation around sentence openings such as “So, First of all” is inconsistent. Practise checking subject–verb agreement and noun phrases, then revise complex sentences to ensure each clause is complete and clearly connected.

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