Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There are numerous food and drink products which contains high level of sugar, which increases risk of many health problems. I agree to make sugary products expensive to decrease the chance of acquiring health issues.

In the recent years, there is an increasing number of health issues such as diabetes worldwide. This is because of an increasing number of companies of sugary products are being manufactured, such as milktea and candy. I believe if those sugary products will be expensive, people will most likely to stop or at least lessen the purchases of those products. As a result, consumers will less likely to acquire health issues such as Diabetes. For instance, students might have a second thought in buying those products because they have a very limited money, this consequently leads to lesser chance of having diabetes in the future.

On the other hand, making them expensive will negatively affect the business of those involved. For example, their profit will most likely lessen everyday, which might cuase bancrupcy because costumers cannot afford it. However, nothing is more important than health. People are becoming wiser in terms of the food they consume.

In conclusion, although making sugary food and drink expensive poses greater risk of bancrupcy to those businesses, health of the people must be prioritized despite of other things such as financial and other aspects.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you agree that higher prices could reduce sugar consumption, and the conclusion restates that public health should take priority. You also address a counterargument by noting possible harm to businesses, so the response covers the main parts of the question. However, the support is uneven: the example of students having limited money is relevant, but the link from reduced purchases to fewer cases of diabetes is asserted rather than explained. The business argument is also brief and could be developed with a more specific consequence or response. The response is 25 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop these ideas. Explain the likely effects and support them with a concrete example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting higher prices, a counterargument, and a conclusion. The progression from the health benefits to the possible business costs is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” help orient the reader. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some of the stronger control associated with more flexible cohesion. However, links between claims are sometimes mechanical or unclear. For example, “As a result” introduces a health outcome without fully explaining the causal steps, while “However” in the business paragraph shifts back to the writer’s position abruptly. Develop each paragraph around a clear main point and use linking phrases only where the relationship between ideas is explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main argument, including “health issues,” “consumers,” “profit,” and “prioritized.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “acquiring health issues” and “limited money,” although these combinations are not always natural or precise. Noticeable spelling and word-choice errors—“cuase,” “bancrupcy,” and “costumers”—reduce accuracy, and repeated use of “products,” “health issues,” and “expensive” limits variety. These features fit a limited but functional range: the reader can understand the argument, but some errors and awkward collocations affect fluency. Build a bank of accurate topic collocations and check spelling, while choosing precise alternatives such as “reduce consumption” rather than repeating “lessen” or “decrease.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a relative clause in “products which contains high level of sugar” and a conditional idea beginning “I believe if those sugary products…”. The overall meaning remains understandable, but some errors in agreement, articles, and verb forms recur. For example, “products which contains” should use a plural verb, and “if those sugary products will be expensive” needs a more suitable conditional structure. The sentence about companies and products being manufactured is also difficult to parse because its clause structure is incomplete. These issues show that you can attempt varied structures, but control is not yet consistent. Practise accurate conditionals and subject–verb agreement, and proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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