Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowdays ,many manufactured food and drink products contain excessive amount of sugar,which can lead to serious health problens .I strongly agree that these products should be made more expensive because this could reduce sugar consumption and encourage healthier lifestyles.

The main reason for increasing the price of sugar product is to discourage people from buying them regularly .When soft drinks ,chocolate and other sweet food become more expensive ,consumers may choose healthier alternatives ,such as fruits and natural juices .As a result ,people could reduce their sugar intake and lower the risk of obesity and diabetes

Another important reason is that higher prices could help governments reduces health care costs.Ecessive sugar consumption is linked to several diseases,which required expensive medical treatment .The money collected from this taxes could also be used to improve public healthcare services.

In conclusion,I firmly believe that increasing the prices of sugary food and drinks is an effective way to discourage exccessive consumption ,prevent health problems and promote healthier society and nation

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you strongly agree that sugary products should cost more. You give two relevant reasons—discouraging purchases and helping reduce healthcare costs—and mention possible alternatives such as fruit and natural juices. However, the response addresses the task only partially because both reasons are stated briefly rather than explained with specific examples or developed consequences. For instance, you could explain how a price increase might change purchasing habits, or give an example of a tax-funded health programme. The conclusion repeats your position but does not add support. The response is also below the required 250 words, which limits the opportunity to develop your argument. Extend each main point with explanation and a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate reasons, and a conclusion. The progression from reducing consumption to lowering healthcare costs is logical, and phrases such as “The main reason” and “Another important reason” help signal the structure. This coherent organisation meets the lower-band expectations well. To show more of the next level, develop the links between claims and their consequences rather than relying mainly on paragraph-opening signals. For example, explain how choosing alternatives would lead to lower sugar intake, then connect that reduction to health outcomes. Some punctuation spacing and missing sentence-final punctuation also make the flow less polished, so careful editing would help the reader move through the argument smoothly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “sugar consumption,” “healthier alternatives,” “obesity,” “diabetes,” and “healthcare services.” These choices are relevant and show some range beyond basic everyday language. However, the vocabulary is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors reduce accuracy: “Nowdays,” “problens,” “Ecessive,” and “exccessive” are misspelled, while “sugar product” and “healthier society and nation” are awkward expressions. Aim to use a wider set of precise phrases and check spelling carefully. For example, “sugary products” is more natural than “sugar product,” and “promote a healthier society” is clearer than the final phrase used.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You communicate your position using mostly simple sentence patterns, with some attempts to add subordinate clauses, such as “because this could reduce sugar consumption” and “which can lead to serious health problems.” This gives the response some structural variety, but the range remains limited and errors occur in several sentences. For example, “governments reduces” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, and “which required expensive medical treatment” uses an unsuitable verb form; “the money collected from this taxes” also has an article and plural mismatch. Sentence punctuation is inconsistent, with missing full stops and spaces around commas. Practise checking agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries, while adding a few accurately controlled complex sentences.

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