Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A large number of factory-made food and drink products have high percentage of sugar, which can lead to many health issues. Sugary products should be made more costly so that people consume less sugar. In my opinion, making sweet products more expensive is the effective approach because people will buy less and the government can also get a lot of money from taxes.

On the first hand, making products more expensive will make people to buy them less. Moreover, if the rate of product is higher, people will buy that product less. For example, if the price of sugary products such as cakes and chocolates will make higher, the less people will buy that product. It will also cause a significant decrease in diabities and obesity. Thus, making the over-priced is the best way to make it less popular among sweet lovers.

On the second hand, government will get more money from taxes on sugary products. With that money government can build hospitals, schools and free-checkup centres for the poor people. For instance, last year Pakistani government put a tax of 50 rupees on sugary products. In result, they collect a huge amount of money and consruct numerous heart hospitals across Pakistan. In addition, diabetic deseases were also recorded less last year. Hence, taxes on sugary products are in favour of people.

In conclusion, sugary items should be made more expensive so that people will buy it lesser and this approach will help government to consturct buildings and play grounds for children. Therefore, this is the best way for reducing the consumption of sweet products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You give a clear opinion that sugary products should cost more, and both body paragraphs offer relevant reasons: higher prices may reduce purchases, while tax revenue could fund public services. The examples of cakes and chocolates and the proposed use of tax money help address the task. However, the two arguments are not developed equally. The claim that higher prices would reduce diabetes and obesity needs explanation of how reduced consumption leads to these outcomes. The Pakistan example is specific, but it is presented as fact without support and does not clearly establish that the tax caused the reported changes. To strengthen the response, explain the likely effects more carefully and support examples with credible, clearly connected reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your position, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates the view. Sequencing phrases such as “Moreover,” “For example,” and “In conclusion” make the intended progression easy to follow. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and some links repeat rather than advance the argument. For instance, “making products more expensive will make people to buy them less” is immediately repeated as “if the rate of product is higher, people will buy that product less.” The references in “that product” and “this approach” are also somewhat vague. Develop each point without restating it, and use clearer links between the price increase, reduced consumption, and health benefits.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate your main ideas, including “health issues,” “taxes,” “obesity,” and “diabetic diseases.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “significant decrease” and “free-checkup centres.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, which makes parts of the argument less natural. Examples include “high percentage of sugar,” “the rate of product,” and “making the over-priced”; “less” is also repeated where “fewer” or “lower consumption” would be more suitable. Spelling errors such as “diabities,” “consruct,” and “consturct” are noticeable. Aim for precise, natural collocations and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if the price … will make higher” and a reason clause beginning “so that.” The overall meaning is generally understandable, but some errors in sentence construction and verb forms reduce accuracy. For example, “will make people to buy them less” should use “make people buy them less,” while “if the price … will make higher” has an incomplete and incorrectly formed clause. The sentence beginning “For example” also lacks a clear grammatical structure. There are additional issues with articles, agreement, and countable forms, as in “people will buy it lesser.” Practise forming accurate conditionals and checking each sentence for a complete subject and verb.

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