Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent time, majority of individuals are suffering from the diabetes and other detrimental ailments owing to over consumption of sugary product. Thus, some social reformers assert that sugar contains product should be more costly to curtail this predicament. In my opinion, I completely disagree with this notion. All the reasons behind my disagreement towards this scenario are elaborated in the following paragraph along with appropriate examples.

To commence with, increasing the price of sugary products does not reduce it overall consumption due to multifarious reasons. The first and foremost one is that, some wealthy people can afford it at any cost. To be more specific, in recent time, majority of people earn adequate income in their life, which allow them to fulfill their daily necessity. So, if authority surges the price of over sugar contain product, those people, who have financial stability can purchase it. As a result, the overall health issues are happening because the use of sugary product might not be regulated. For instance, in China, local authority impose high taxes on food to over come its consumption and its negative outcomes in the society; however rich people is still consuming it and they are becoming the victim of diabetes.

Furthermore, there are several negative results are associated with rising the cost of sugary products. The primary one is that, the high develop industries, who are produced sugary product are in financial instability. To elaborate this, although overall utilization of sugar content is not reduced due to its cost, some people have limited income source and they cannot afford the high price of sugary product. Henceforth, they do not prefer to consume sugary product in their life, which undeniably reduce the sell of sugar contain product, which not only leads into the financial loss of well established firms but it also creates disease, which can be occurred among the individuals due to less sugar content in their body. To exemplify, in India, majority of sugar produced industries are shut down now as government rise the price of sugar content product in the market, which created financial hurdles for the many organizations.

In conclusion, imposing high cost on sugary product is not permanent measure to plunge the its diverse implication on people health, since some wealthy people can still afford it and consume it in their life as well as increasing price of sugary content also contributes to the financial problems of many industries. Therefore it is not optimum solution to reduce intact of sugary product among the people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The ideas are relevant, though the development is somewhat inconsistent. For instance, the argument regarding the health risks of 'less sugar content' in the body is scientifically questionable and lacks logical support, which weakens the overall persuasiveness. While the student provides examples from China and India, these are somewhat generalized and could be more effectively integrated to support the core argument. The response covers all parts of the task, but the depth of analysis is limited by some repetitive phrasing and slightly illogical reasoning in the second body paragraph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'To commence with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In conclusion' are used to structure the response. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Henceforth' used in a context that does not fit well. Referencing is generally clear, but there are instances where the flow is interrupted by grammatical errors, which occasionally makes the relationship between ideas less smooth than it could be.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the student to express their opinion clearly. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, such as 'multifarious,' 'predicament,' and 'detrimental.' However, there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'sugar contains product' instead of 'sugar-containing products' and 'high develop industries' instead of 'highly developed industries.' These errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding the intended meaning. A wider range of precise vocabulary would be needed for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with articles ('the authority,' 'the sell'), pluralization ('sugar produced industries'), and subject-verb agreement ('rich people is still consuming'). While the meaning remains clear, these persistent errors indicate a lack of control over complex structures. Punctuation is generally functional, but the frequency of grammatical slips limits the score. To improve, the student should focus on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors in articles and verb forms.

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