Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Most of the manufactured food and drink items contain a huge amount of sugar, which causes various health issues. The price of the products that contain sugar should be increased to encourage individuals to consume less sugar. I strongly agree with view because a large proportion of sugar increases the fat in individuals' bodies and also cause various diseases such as diabetes, heart attack, etc.

Firstly, consuming too much sugar increases the weight of a person. Nowadays, several health problems arise due to the large amount of fats in the body. For instance, an obese person contains high cholesterol, which in turn leads to a heart attack. Secondly, it also leads to a permanent disease such as diabetes, which cannot be controlled when it's gone to the last stage. For example, if a person has diabetes, he or she might have to live on insulin, which has to be taken before eating food.

On the other hand, consuming the sugar higher than the limit causes tooth decay in children. However, kids are more excited to eat sugary foods such as chocolate, ice cream, etc.; this might cause rusting of the teeth and lead to removal of the teeth. Furthermore, carbonated drinks cause stomach problems in the long run. Individuals prefer to drink cold drinks such as Pepsi, Coca-Cola, Thumbs Up, etc., which causes stomach infections after a decade. A recent study has found out that this drink can clean toilets more efficiently than most other specific chemicals. With this experiment, researchers suggest that these drinks are more dangerous to consume.

In conclusion, though sugar is needed by the body, it should be consumed in a particular proportion. Sugary products lead to various problems, from issues related to the heart to the lifetime problems. The government should increase the price of the items that contain a large amount of sugar so that people will think twice before buying these products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses the prompt clearly and maintains a consistent position throughout. You have identified the core issue—the health impact of sugar—and supported the proposal to increase prices. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the health consequences are well-explained, the link between price increases and consumer behavior is only briefly mentioned in the conclusion. To reach a higher band, ensure that the economic argument is as well-developed as the medical one. You have provided relevant examples, such as diabetes and tooth decay, which effectively support your stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore' to guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the paragraphing could be more sophisticated. For instance, the transition to the second body paragraph ('On the other hand') is slightly confusing because you are not presenting a counter-argument, but rather an additional point about health. Improving the logical flow between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'manufactured', 'carbonated', and 'efficiently'. There are some instances of slightly unnatural word choices, such as 'rusting of the teeth' (which is not a standard collocation) and 'gone to the last stage'. While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your argument. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and precise terminology related to health and economics to demonstrate a more sophisticated command of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'I strongly agree with view' (missing article), 'consuming the sugar higher than the limit' (awkward phrasing), and 'this drink can clean' (referring to plural drinks). While these errors are noticeable, they rarely impede the reader's understanding. To achieve a higher band, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures, such as using more conditional or passive constructions, would also be beneficial.

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