Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The food and drinks which contain high level of sugar is a significant issue in the modern era.while some people aruge that having high amount of sugar in drinking and food are not a major issue.I believe that consumption ho high level of sugar is very dangerous for health and it is also work as a slow poison.

This eassy will discus both views and explain why I support this perspective

The primary reason is that foods and drinks contain high level of sugar can increase your insulin level which cause diabetes For example if insulin level get increased day day day firstly it case diabetes it also effects eyes sight and can cause of heart problems too.

Another key point is that now a day’s people are addicted to many kinds of drinks which also contain high level of sugar people feel craving of such type of food which contain high amount of sugar such as cakes , chocolates, candies and smoothies/slush which effect directly and indirectly in many organs my personal experience is i always try to eat some kind of sweet after my every day meal and in late night i used to eat chocolate which caused tooth cavities future more many people think that consuming high level of suger didn’t effect on them but now most of people avoid suger in such way they avoid to take one spoon of suger but it causes low levels of suger so in conclusion i frimly believe that every thing which have high level of sugar should be used moderately so it cannot harm any oargan or maintain insulin level and man can enjoy their life in healthy way.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position, but the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you mention health risks like diabetes and heart problems, the argument regarding the economic proposal (making products more expensive) is largely neglected. Instead, the essay focuses on personal habits and general health advice. To reach a higher band, you must ensure that every part of the prompt is addressed; specifically, you need to discuss whether you agree or disagree with the suggestion of increasing prices. The conclusion also shifts focus away from the prompt's core question, which weakens the overall task response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay lacks clear paragraphing, which makes it difficult to follow the progression of ideas. The text is essentially one large block, which hinders the logical flow. While you use some cohesive devices like 'The primary reason is' and 'Another key point', the transitions between sentences are often mechanical or abrupt. There is a lack of effective paragraph breaks to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. To improve, focus on structuring your essay into distinct paragraphs, each with a clear topic sentence, and use a wider variety of linking words to connect your ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. You rely heavily on repetitive phrasing, such as 'high level of sugar' and 'foods and drinks'. There are also several spelling errors, such as 'eassy', 'discus', 'suger', 'frimly', and 'oargan', which occasionally distract the reader. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations related to health and economics, and pay closer attention to spelling accuracy. Expanding your range of vocabulary will help you express your ideas with more nuance and impact.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that sometimes impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The food and drinks... is'), missing articles, and run-on sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of periods and commas, which makes some sentences difficult to parse. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subjects and verbs agree, and using punctuation correctly to separate independent clauses. Consistent practice with proofreading will help you identify and correct these recurring errors.

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