Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-07-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In the contemporary era, myriad health aliments are occurring due to immensive levels of sugar in manufactured food and drink products. some people reckon that if the price of these product would increase than people will consume it. I disagree with this notion. I would discuss about it in the subsequence paragraphs.
To commence with, majority of consumers are children .They depend on their parents to purchase food .So It will not be beneficial to increase price and burden on them to fulfill their extravagant demands. Therefore, it has indirectly financial burden.For example, if a child has been eaten chocolate daily before going school .He has habit to take it .Morever, it would not gone either expensive or cheap.
Secondly, as they are addicted , might be sell their precious things and can take illegal work for purchase money or food.Rather than rose the price of sugary items ,government ought to educate them about health problem such as diabetes. Furthermore, seminar should held in schools, colleges and local parks to aware people.
To encapsulate, it is not a good solution to increase the price to distract masses from sugary food and drinks. Authorities should educate them and aware them about health issues.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position against the price increase. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the development of ideas. While the main points (financial burden on parents and the risk of illicit behavior) are relevant, they are not fully extended or supported with sufficient detail. The conclusion is brief and repetitive. Because the response fails to meet the length requirement, the development of the argument is constrained, preventing a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'To commence with' and 'To encapsulate'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the pronoun 'they' is used without a clear antecedent. The progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed due to the lack of sufficient supporting sentences, making the overall flow feel abrupt.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is limited and contains several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'aliments' instead of 'ailments', 'immensive' instead of 'immense', and 'rose' instead of 'raising'. Some phrases are awkward, such as 'take illegal work for purchase money'. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'manufactured food' and 'authorities', the overall range is narrow and the errors occasionally impede the clarity of the message.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay relies on simple sentence structures with frequent grammatical errors. There are issues with verb tense consistency ('if the price... would increase than people will consume it'), article usage, and sentence fragments ('They depend on their parents to purchase food .So It will not be beneficial'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with spaces placed incorrectly before periods. Complex structures are attempted but are generally inaccurate, which limits the score for grammatical range.
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