Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Multiple manufactured of food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which cause dangerous health problems like diabetes. Hence sugary products should be made more costly to encourage people to consume less sugar, which I disagree that instead of make it costly we should spread awareness of about sugar consumption.

On the one hand, the idea of making expensive sugar can effect on sellers and also ordinary people. In is very important to add sugar in food for the taste even if its little, and if consumers will not buy sugar that can be uphill task for small businesses to earn. As sugar made from sugarcane, if the production of sugar will get decreased the farmers whose whole income depend on it will also be on loss. But having excessive amount of sugar can cause disease like diabetes and heart problems.

On the other hand, there should be awareness in people to have balanced amount of sugar consumption. For example, in the cold drink like Coke has highest amount of sugar but people still drink it. Instead of that people will transfer to eat dry fruits, fruits and milk which can benefit them. Whereas in some country like Mexico and USA there has only given a tax which is resulted in a noticeable decline in sugary drinks.

In conclusion, instead of directly increase in amount that can bring to selling of less product and create economic crisis we should spread an awareness campaigns and tell people to reduce the consumption of sugar and use balanced diet.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position against the tax and suggesting an alternative approach. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the economic impact on farmers and businesses, these points are not fully extended. The mention of Mexico and the USA is a good attempt at providing evidence, but it is slightly contradictory as you cite a 'noticeable decline' in sugary drinks, which actually supports the argument for taxation rather than your own stance. To improve, ensure your supporting examples consistently align with your stated position and provide more depth to your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and there are instances where referencing is unclear, such as in the phrase 'if consumers will not buy sugar that can be uphill task.' The transition between ideas within paragraphs could be smoother to improve the overall progression of your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'diabetes,' 'economic crisis,' and 'sugary drinks.' However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'making expensive sugar' (should be 'increasing the price of sugary products') and 'transfer to eat' (should be 'switch to eating'). To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive or unnatural phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'Multiple manufactured of food' (incorrect noun phrase), 'instead of make it costly' (should be 'making'), and 'if the production of sugar will get decreased' (incorrect conditional structure). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence construction prevents a higher score.

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