Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In modern world, everyone is giving importance to their health. One key product always comes whenever the topic is health and that is sugar. There are a lot of arguments among people that is sugar healthy or not? As consumption of sugar is not beneficial to health , so all things which include sugar are also become the main topic of debate. And many manufactured foods and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Individuals who are strictly concerned about health and privilege enough to buy healthy alternatives can easily avoid sugar and live a healthy lifestyle but when it comes to low income families , it become difficult for them to buy expensive alternatives. Everything which is under budget is not healthy. The products contains huge amount of sugar are cheap and accessible at every place. That is why i strongly agree that sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

One of the main ways of consumption of sugar is beverages. People consumes a lot of beverages like fanta, limca, fruit juices , cococola and more without knowing these beverages consist of large amount of sugar and preservatives. Furthermore, Biscuits are the main source of consumption of sugar. These are easy to buy and under budget. In India, approximately everyone have biscuits with their tea on the daily basis which is becoming the major reason for increasing diabetes patients.

Sugar causes number of diseases that are not easily detectable. In conclusion, i believe that availability of these products should be less. If the product is not available at home, people will consume this less. And availability decreases with the increases in the prices. Therefore, sugary products should be made more expensive.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of increasing taxes on sugary products. The ideas are relevant, such as the impact on low-income families and the prevalence of sugary beverages and biscuits. However, the development is somewhat limited. While you mention that sugary products are cheap, you could have expanded more on the economic mechanism of taxation or the potential counter-arguments, such as the impact on personal freedom or the effectiveness of such policies. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, restating the main point without summarizing the key arguments effectively. To reach a higher band, ensure each body paragraph provides a deeper analysis of the 'why' and 'how' behind your claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. There is a clear progression of ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally repetitive. For example, the transition 'Furthermore' is used, but other linking words are missing or basic. Some sentences feel disjointed, such as 'Everything which is under budget is not healthy.' Improving the flow between sentences by using a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'consequently,' 'in addition to this,' 'nevertheless') would help the text read more naturally and improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the message to be conveyed clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'manufactured food,' 'consumption,' and 'preservatives.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are some awkward collocations, such as 'everyone is giving importance to their health' (better: 'everyone is becoming more health-conscious') and 'privilege enough' (should be 'privileged enough'). There is also some repetition of basic words like 'sugar' and 'products.' To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and idiomatic expressions to demonstrate a wider lexical range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors that affect the precision of your writing. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('all things which include sugar are also become' should be 'also become'), article usage ('In modern world' should be 'In the modern world'), and pluralization errors ('Sugar causes number of diseases' should be 'a number of diseases'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing before commas. Increasing the variety of complex structures while focusing on accuracy in basic grammar will help elevate your score.

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