Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Many people think that sugar is not beneficial for health . On the other hand , sugar taste is sweet and people want to eat them every day . İn my opinion , I agree with this .
Sugary products causes health problem such as obesity and heart diseases . People should not eat sugary products who have health problems . However try not to eat fast food which is very hard . So if sugary products be more expensive , this would support on healthy life. People are avoid to sugary products easily . As a result , people tend to eat balanced diet .
İndividuals think that rich people who have serious health problem in this situation . They can pay easily what they want . I think it is make sense however nobody do not want to pay a high price for only sugary products . That would be unreasonble . As a result if this products be more expensive , this would encourge people consume less sugar in both situation .
Some consumers think that this is unfair . Because , No one can interfere with people's eating habits. This is sound right however people do not notice their responsibility nowadays . So they do not care what they eat or drink . İt causes obesite mostly and you should know that , this diseases very populer nowadays and threated people life . Especially childerens life . İn conculusion , i sugary products more expensive , this would be save peoples life
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of increasing the price of sugary products. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you mention health issues like obesity and heart disease, the arguments remain somewhat repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the counter-argument regarding wealthy individuals is introduced but not fully explored or effectively refuted. To improve, ensure each paragraph provides a distinct, well-supported point rather than restating the same general idea. The conclusion is also quite brief and lacks a summary of the main points discussed, which is necessary for a more comprehensive response.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'As a result' are used repeatedly, and some transitions, such as 'In this situation' or 'In both situation', do not logically connect the ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to follow the flow of the argument. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence logically follows from the previous one. Improving the logical progression between sentences will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally basic and repetitive. You rely on simple terms like 'sugary products', 'health problems', and 'eat'. There are also several errors in word choice and form, such as 'this diseases very populer' instead of 'these diseases are very common' and 'threated people life' instead of 'threaten people's lives'. The spelling of 'obesite' (obesity), 'childerens' (children), and 'conculusion' (conclusion) also indicates a need for more careful proofreading. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise vocabulary related to health and economics, and focus on correct word forms and collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'sugary products causes'), article usage, and sentence structure (e.g., 'if sugary products be more expensive'). The use of complex sentences is attempted, but they are often faulty, such as 'nobody do not want to pay', which contains a double negative. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas and periods. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and practicing the correct use of conditional sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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