Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There has been a significant growth measured in health related problem, especially for patients who are suffering from the diabetes. Considering this, there are vast amount of manufactured products contain increasing number of sugar. on that note, such items should be costly to reduce sugar consumption. I completely agree with this note and reasons for this discuss further.

To start with, there are several compelling reasons justifying my opinion. The most prominent one is issue related to diabetes. because of high sugar consumption, people are suffering from this disease which results in some heart related problems such as lower heart bit and breathing problems. For instance, countries like India where a study found that number of people go through heart problems is because of higher sugar intake. Apart from this, when sugar products will be made expensive, its sale should be reduced due to which production might decrease. as a result, air pollution will be reduce because sugar production manufactured in factories that produce more harmful gases.

Another significant concern is that when people are encouraged to consume reduce consumption of sugary food and drinks, they tent to have control on their sweet addiction, disease cause by sugar reduces , due to which government can invest that money in other demanding medicines. For example, in countries like Chine where there has been a decline trend recorded in health issues cause by sugar after which they invented numerous medicine of other demanding disease.

To conclude, although there are some drawbacks of this trend like expensive food and drink items, i believe that it is quite beneficial to consume less sugar due to reasons like better heart health and pollution free environment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the link between sugar consumption and health issues is clear, the argument regarding air pollution is tangential and lacks a logical connection to the core issue of sugar taxation. Additionally, the examples provided, such as the reference to India and China, are vague and lack specific detail, which limits the depth of the argument. To improve, ensure that all supporting points directly relate to the prompt and provide more concrete, well-explained examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To start with', 'Apart from this', and 'To conclude', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'on that note' and 'after which they invented'. Furthermore, referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second body paragraph where the connection between sugar reduction and government investment in medicine is not fully explained. Improving the flow between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there is a lack of precision and some noticeable errors in word choice. For instance, 'growth measured in health related problem' is unnatural, and 'lower heart bit' (likely meaning 'heart rate') is incorrect. The phrase 'demanding medicines' is also misused in this context. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'consumption' and 'manufactured products', the range is limited. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive or misused terminology.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'products contain' vs 'products contains'), article usage (e.g., 'the diabetes'), and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'air pollution will be reduce'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several instances of missing capital letters at the start of sentences and incorrect comma placement. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band score.

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