Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

For people's lives, few things are more crucial than controlling to consume less sugar containing foods and beverages.In many developed and developing nations ,a substantial amount of money and efforts is allocated to produced less harmful daily products as it often necessitates the uses of various resources such as strict monitoring manufacturing less sugary products, market monitoring, health awareness campaigns, public awareness programs.Nowadays ,many would agree that a contemporary society has evolved beyond its traditional boundaries and has become increasingly reliant on healthy and balanced lifestyle by avoid less sugary products to enhance the quality of life . Nevertheless, I firmly believe that ,instead of increase product price people should encouraged to eat limited sugar containing products.

Naturally, food containing small amount of sugar is essential for people's lives, creating more healthy lifestyle that are seldom elsewhere. Moreover, it demonstrate unparalleled benefits for individual permeating and enhancing to prevent health hazards such as Diabetes, Obesity, high blood pressure almost every conceivable sector of society. Since people seek to avoid illness and keep fit by avoiding fast-food ,ample investment is imperative by Government arranging public awareness program, for the betterment of people's lives. If this approach is adopted by authority and many organizations alike many would stand to benefit significantly. To promote sugar free food and drinks ,Denmark and Finland for instance has emerged as a pivotal model for delivering enhance services for their people.

On the other hand, by increasing sugary products prices, consumers may have several challenges such as poor people can't afford to buy expensive product so they suffers a lot. Under certain circumstances, many companies may shy away from producing sugar free product due to some challenges such as, manufacturing high cost issues, lack of skilled manpower, financial limitations, lack of support from Government. While, less sugary products in many major cities world wide, frequently contend with profound financial limitations and deteriorating condition when striving to implement this approach. Thus, avoid sugar containing food and beverage is not always appealing. From social, economic , national perspective, if the goal of people dictate that, avoid unhealthy food is not merely an option but an imperative, they may choose to embrace it.

However, it is the responsibility of people to determine, whether the role of healthy less sugar containing food and determine it will do more harm than good. Thus, fostering an interest in healthy balanced diet is beneficial.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position against increasing prices, suggesting awareness campaigns instead. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you mention Denmark and Finland, the connection to the argument is vague, and the explanation of why price increases are negative is somewhat repetitive. The essay struggles to maintain a clear, logical flow of arguments, often veering into unclear generalizations such as 'creating more healthy lifestyle that are seldom elsewhere.' To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported point that directly relates to the prompt's core question.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the internal logic is often difficult to follow. Transitions like 'Naturally' and 'On the other hand' are used, but they do not always signal a logical progression of thought. For example, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, some sentences are disjointed, such as the list of resources in the first paragraph, which lacks a clear grammatical structure. Improving the use of cohesive devices to link ideas within and between sentences would significantly enhance the readability of your work.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your meaning, but there are frequent issues with word choice and collocation. Phrases like 'controlling to consume less sugar containing foods' and 'individual permeating' are unnatural and imprecise. You attempt to use academic vocabulary, but the application is often inaccurate, such as 'deteriorating condition when striving to implement this approach.' To reach a higher band, focus on using words in their correct context and avoid over-complicating sentences with vocabulary that does not fit the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede understanding. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Denmark and Finland... has emerged'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'instead of increase product price people should encouraged'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas and periods. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction prevents the essay from reaching a higher band score.

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