Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowdays,many producer of food and drink items mix high levels of sweetner ,due to this many critical health issues occurs.products which contain rich sugar should be more priceable to attract people to consume medium level of sugar.This essay will agree with this statement which give more explanation in the forthcominmg paragraphs.

To commence with,this is the main reason people buying more sugary items in their daily life because unhealthy products always cheaper than healthy one. To explain,company always attract consumer mind with sell items on the lowest price and also consumer didn't focus on the ingredients thats why people would faces the more health conscious. For example,a recent reseach shows how individuals trapped by their strategy and effect their life behind a discounts product. Therefore, mostly younger childrean have obesity problems and older one have heart complications .

However, manufacturers promotes their product by huge advertisment with the famours creaters and actors. In detail,people will increase their buying because in the add which actor promoting the product always society influence for sure to try the product.For instance, In many European countries authrities take a action against the firms which attract customers to show false information on their advertisment. As a result, some food chains increase their prices for unhealthy food but it will make sure use a appropriate material to make food.

In conclusion, companies frequent choose to famous face to advertise their product to engage more customer but it will promote negatice effect on the youngers to choose false information behind the televisson

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of increasing prices for sugary products. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the first body paragraph attempts to link price to consumption, the second paragraph shifts focus toward advertising and celebrity influence, which is only tangentially related to the core argument of taxation or pricing. The response lacks depth in explaining how price increases would specifically lead to behavioral changes. The conclusion is also somewhat disconnected, focusing on advertising rather than summarizing the main argument regarding price regulation. To improve, ensure every paragraph directly supports the central thesis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression between and within them is often weak. Cohesive devices are used (e.g., 'To commence with', 'However', 'In conclusion'), but they are sometimes used mechanically or inappropriately, such as using 'To commence with' to start a paragraph that does not logically follow the introduction. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second paragraph where the link between celebrity advertising and the proposed price increase is not explicitly stated. The flow of ideas is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing, which makes the overall argument difficult to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'priceable' instead of 'expensive' or 'taxed', 'medium level of sugar' instead of 'reduced consumption', and 'the more health conscious' instead of 'healthier'. The student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles to express complex ideas precisely. Spelling errors are also frequent (e.g., 'Nowdays', 'sweetner', 'reseach', 'childrean', 'negatice'). To reach a higher band, the student needs to focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and improving spelling accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'many producer... mix', 'company always attract'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, such as 'To explain,company always attract consumer mind with sell items on the lowest price and also consumer didn't focus on the ingredients thats why people would faces the more health conscious.' The range of structures is limited, and the errors are pervasive throughout the text, which significantly affects the clarity of the message.

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