Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Several artificially synthesized food and drink products cause many health problems as it possess significant amount of sugar. Sugary products must be made expensive that encourages less intake of sugar among individuals. I totally disagree with the statements as it poses financial problems and starvation among some people.

On one hand, some people from lower class earn on daily wages and mainly depend on manufactured products. Individuals not only use sugary products but they also use sugar on large scale for making and eating food. The high prices of such products will not only cut off the usage of sugar but it will cause financial problem among individuals who can not afford other food products that have a measureable amount of sugar. In addition, people from higher classes will still afford thto buy products but poor people will face starvation. For instance, people who live in slums significantly depend on bakery products that contain a major content of sugar. Hence, other alternatives for such products can be used to eliminate consumption of sugar.

In contrast, sugary products increases the risk of diseases like diabetes. A measureable amount of sugar in the daily life is essential but its enhanced use causes deadly effects on humans. The increasing demands for bakery products and fast food is significantly rising theses days. Hence, a increase in the price will encourgae people to consume less amount of sugar.

It is concluded that, artifically prepared food and drinks cause health issues and high cost would encourgae people in less consumption of sugar. I disagree with the concept because the increase in price not only affects the businesses but it also affects the people who greatly depend on sugary products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

You have addressed the prompt by taking a clear position against the proposed tax. You provide relevant arguments regarding the financial burden on lower-income groups and the potential for starvation. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the suggestion that 'other alternatives' could be used is mentioned but not explained. Additionally, your conclusion contradicts your introduction; you state you disagree with the concept, but then suggest that high costs would encourage less consumption, which weakens your overall stance. To improve, ensure your arguments are consistently aligned with your thesis throughout the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On one hand', 'In addition', and 'In contrast' to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the transition into the third paragraph. Furthermore, the logical flow is occasionally disrupted by the contradictory nature of your arguments, particularly in the conclusion where you seem to support the tax despite your initial disagreement. Improving the logical progression between sentences and ensuring your conclusion reflects your main body arguments will enhance your score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'artificially synthesized', 'measureable amount', and 'financial burden'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'possess significant amount' (should be 'possesses a significant amount') and 'afford thto buy'. Some phrases are repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'sugary products'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and varying your vocabulary to avoid repetition, while ensuring that your word choices are grammatically accurate in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this level. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('products... it possess'), missing articles ('on large scale'), and awkward phrasing ('the increase in price not only affects the businesses but it also affects the people'). While these errors do not completely obscure your meaning, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage to improve your accuracy.

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