Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Numerous manufactured food and drink products consist of high levels of sugar, which leads to many health issues. Certain individuals argue that sugary products should be made more expensive to persuade people into consuming less sugar. I personally agree with the fact that they should raise the prices of sugary products because if commercial enterprises decide to raise the prices of their sugary products; It will discourage customers from buying sugary products and buy healthier alternatives instead.

When businesses increase the prices of their high-sugar products, it will discourage people from buying the products as they are highly expensive. When the prices are raised, customers will realize that they have been buying unhealthy stuff and start working on their diet. For instance, when a candy shop raises the prices of their lollipops, parents will stop buying from the shop and kids will get used to eating without sugar. As a result, the kids build a healthier diet.

Another advantage of increasing the price of sugary products is that it may encourage consumers to choose healthier alternatives. When raising prices of a certain product high in sugar, customers may find similar products that contain fewer sugar, reducing their overall sugar intake. For example, if a restaurant starts insanely raising their prices, customers will stop buying and start finding other restaurants that might contain less sugar. As a result, customers will be healthier and consume more nutritious foods.

In conclusion, although raising prices of sugary content can cause a negative impact on businesses, it can encourage people to start buying healthier alternatives and stop buying high-sugar products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position in favor of increasing prices on sugary products. The ideas are relevant, such as the potential for price hikes to discourage consumption and encourage healthier alternatives. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, and the examples provided—such as a candy shop raising prices on lollipops—are simplistic and lack depth. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the broader socio-economic implications or provide more nuanced arguments regarding the effectiveness of such policies, rather than repeating the same point about discouragement in each paragraph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For example, the phrase 'When the prices are raised' and 'As a result' are used frequently to link ideas. While the paragraphing is sufficient, the transitions between sentences could be more varied and sophisticated to improve the flow of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the message to be conveyed clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'commercial enterprises,' 'nutritious foods,' and 'sugar intake.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic vocabulary such as 'unhealthy stuff' and 'insanely raising.' To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and avoid informal phrasing. The word choice is functional but lacks the flexibility and sophistication required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as the incorrect use of a semicolon in the first paragraph ('...sugary products; It will...'), which should be a comma or a new sentence. Additionally, there are minor errors in subject-verb agreement and article usage (e.g., 'fewer sugar' instead of 'less sugar'). The control of punctuation is inconsistent, which occasionally interrupts the flow of the text.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.