Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In the modern world, food production is growing rapidly, higher than ever before, because of demand and overpopulation. The trend of people tending to buy food or drinks containing high levels of sugar is resulting in health concerns for individuals. I agree with this notion: sugary products should be made more expensive to discourage consumption.
The main reason people are choosing sugary items is that they are easily available and often more appealing than healthier options. Many manufactured products, such as soft drinks, chocolates and packaged snacks, contain a large amount of added sugar. Since these products are relatively cheap, people may consume them regularly without considering their longterm effects on health. Therefore, increasing their prices through additional taxes could encourage consumers to reduce their intake and choose healthier options instead.
Another important reason for making sugary products more expensive is the impact of excessive sugar consumption on public health. A diet that contains too much sugar can contribute to obesity, diabetes and other health problems. These conditions can place a significant burden on individuals as well as healthcare systems. For example, if sugary drinks were taxed more heavily, consumers might be more likely to purchase water, fresh fruit or other low_sugar alternatives. The additional tax revenue could also be used by governments tompromote healthy eating and fund public health campaings
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of the argument. While the main points regarding health impacts and economic incentives are relevant, they are not fully extended. The conclusion is entirely missing, which is a significant omission for an academic essay. To reach a higher band, you must provide a more comprehensive development of your ideas and ensure you include a concluding paragraph that summarises your main points and restates your position.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organised into paragraphs, with each paragraph focusing on a central idea. Cohesive devices such as 'The main reason', 'Therefore', and 'Another important reason' are used effectively to guide the reader through the argument. However, the lack of a concluding paragraph disrupts the overall progression of the essay. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is clear, but the abrupt ending makes the structure feel incomplete. Improving the flow by adding a summary and ensuring consistent paragraph structure will improve this score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is generally appropriate and sufficient for the task. You demonstrate the ability to use topic-specific terms like 'manufactured products', 'added sugar', and 'healthcare systems'. There are a few minor spelling errors, such as 'tompromote' and 'campaings', which are likely slips but should be avoided. The range of vocabulary is adequate but lacks the sophistication or less common lexical items required for higher bands. Try to incorporate more precise collocations and varied academic vocabulary to enhance the quality of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Since these products are relatively cheap, people may consume them regularly...'. While the grammar is generally accurate and communication is not impeded, there are some minor errors in punctuation and phrasing. For example, 'low_sugar' should be hyphenated as 'low-sugar'. The sentence structures are functional but lack the variety and complexity needed for a higher band. Focusing on using a wider range of complex grammatical structures, such as passive voice or conditional clauses, will help demonstrate greater control.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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