Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The number of diabetic people are increasing day by day world wide due to the usuage of sugary products. Due to this, many persons have developed different kinds of health releated diseases. I strongly agree that sugary products should get less affordable in order to encourage people get healthy.
By making sugary products more expensive will have both pros and cons. If we talk about cons, our body basically needs sugar for its proper functioning and by making it less affordable, many people who can't afford it may develop some other health issues as well despite having sugary related health issues. In this way the death rate will also increase which is not acceptable.
Lets discuss about pros, if the sugary products will be made expensive, many people will surely not consume it the way they used to consume before. There are also some other ways as well to encourage the people for healthy diet. For example, by making advestisements about the harms of excessive sugar intake, by doing seminars about the side effects of soft drinks and sugary products, many people will surely be encouraged to consume less sugary products.
By making the sugary products more expensive have both the pros and cons, I will definitely say that the point about making the sugary products less affordable is valid and I strongly agree with this.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position, but it fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you present both sides of the argument, the discussion is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding the 'death rate' increasing due to a lack of sugar is not logically supported or explained. To improve, you need to expand your arguments with more detailed examples and ensure you meet the length requirement to allow for a more thorough exploration of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'By making...', 'In this way...'). The transition between the pros and cons is abrupt, and the logical progression within paragraphs could be smoother. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more naturally, such as 'consequently,' 'furthermore,' or 'on the other hand,' rather than relying on simple sentence starters.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision expected at higher bands. You use basic terms like 'sugary products' repeatedly. There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as 'usuage' (usage) and 'releated' (related). To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to health and economics, and ensure you use words in their correct collocations. For example, instead of 'get less affordable,' use 'become prohibitively expensive.'
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder the flow. Examples include 'The number of diabetic people are increasing' (should be 'is increasing'), 'sugary products should get less affordable' (should be 'should be made less affordable'), and 'by doing seminars' (should be 'by holding seminars'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are noticeable. Focus on subject-verb agreement and more accurate preposition usage to improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.