Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is generally noticed that health problems are increasing due to high level of sugar in food and drink products. some people believe that the price of sugary products should rise in order to reduce their use. While this step might useful, I personally believe that other ways should be preferred.

One major reason for not making sugary products expensive is that it can increase the issue of hunger. There are many people who cannot afford expensive items due to their financial status. If these items are costly , they have to remain without food. Therefore, the crime rate may increase.

Another factor is that other ways have more potential to reduce the use of sugar. An awareness regarding the results of consuming excessive amount of sugar can motivate people to balance sugar in their diet. When they are educate about the reasons of obesity and chelostrole, they avoid those sugary foods. As a result, people can prevent from various health problems.

However, increasing the prices of items can avoid people to purchase sugary products less amount. When the costs are high, they prefer to buy inexpensive items.

In conclusion, although increasing prices might helpful, it would create another problems in the society. Nevertheless, education would be more effective way to control the utilization of sugary products.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position against the proposed tax, suggesting education as an alternative. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the development of ideas. The argument regarding 'hunger' and 'crime' is somewhat tenuous and lacks logical depth. While the main points are relevant, the under-length nature of the response prevents a full exploration of the topic, resulting in a limited development of the supporting arguments. To improve, you must expand on your reasoning with more specific examples and ensure you meet the minimum word count requirement to allow for a more comprehensive discussion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'One major reason', 'Another factor', and 'In conclusion' to signal transitions. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the logical progression within paragraphs is occasionally hindered by simplistic phrasing. For instance, the transition between the discussion of education and the counter-argument about pricing is abrupt. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the relationship between your ideas is more explicitly stated.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. You use basic terms like 'good', 'bad', or 'ways' repeatedly. There are also some errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'chelostrole' (cholesterol) and 'avoid people to purchase' (which should be 'discourage people from purchasing'). To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and precise terminology related to health and economics. Avoid repeating the same words and aim for more sophisticated synonyms to demonstrate a broader lexical range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'might useful' (should be 'might be useful'), 'they are educate' (should be 'they are educated'), and 'create another problems' (should be 'create other problems'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in verb forms, articles, and pluralization suggest a lack of control over complex structures. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs and passive voice constructions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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