Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Many manufactured food and drinks products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems although sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. I am strongly agree with this statement because it reduce the number of disease auch as obesity, diabetes and heart attacks.
To commence with, one of the major cause of consuming high sugary products (like food and sugar) creates health problems such as heart disease, obesity and diabetes. To clear it precisely, it will affect the number of disease in the hospitals. For example, Mexico is the country that increase the price of sugary products and imposing tax on these products, as a result the consumption of sugar products automatically decrease. Hence, it reduces the level of fat and cholestrol in body that is the main cause of chubbing.
Moving on further, increase the prices of sugary products will affect the poor people because they are more relay on fast foods like noodles, momos and chilli potatoes, they are cheaper to buy and easily available. Furthermore, imposing high tax on sugar products is not affect the main consumer of these products is poor people and they are fully money-minded and mainly, children are the major consumer of this. For instance, many students
are not outweigh because of consumption of sugar products (like snacks and cold drinks). Therefore, by reducing sugar consumption we can help the younger generation to grow up healthier.
To sumup, by imposing high tax on sugary products is not a well good option to reduce demands but by encouraging people and well education we can easily reduce the demand of sugary products. Taking help from governments by applying schlogans and banners of this issue.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position, although the argument is somewhat contradictory. While you initially state you strongly agree with taxing sugary products, your conclusion suggests that taxation is 'not a well good option,' which confuses the reader. The ideas are relevant, such as mentioning obesity and diabetes, but the development is inconsistent. For instance, the second paragraph introduces the idea that taxes affect the poor, but the argument is fragmented and lacks a clear logical conclusion. To improve, ensure your position remains consistent throughout the essay and provide more cohesive support for your claims rather than introducing conflicting viewpoints in the final paragraph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is frequently interrupted by unclear transitions and awkward phrasing. While you use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Moving on further,' they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly. The referencing is occasionally confusing, such as in the second paragraph where the link between the example of Mexico and the conclusion about 'chubbing' is not clearly articulated. The final paragraph introduces a new argument that contradicts the previous ones, which disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the essay.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. There are several instances of non-standard word choices or incorrect collocations, such as 'chubbing' (instead of obesity or weight gain), 'well good option,' and 'money-minded.' You also struggle with word forms, such as 'increase the price' instead of 'increasing the price.' While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'consumption' and 'diabetes,' the overall lexical control is limited, and some phrasing sounds unnatural or imprecise, which occasionally hinders the clarity of your argument.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('it reduce the number'), incorrect verb forms ('is not affect'), and awkward sentence construction ('I am strongly agree'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, and some sentences are run-on or fragmented. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence structure prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage would significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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