Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In todays era, where every other food product contains a very high level of artificial sugar; it definitely affects the consumers health. It should be encouraged to make sugary items economically high so that it keeps people away from it and i strongly agree with this statement. It is one of the best way to keep people away from unhealthy sweets because it genuinely cause so much harm to one's health and even often times, that harm is not curable.

Although, the companies on purpose make these items pocket friendly since they care very less about the health of others. If the white sugar would also be as expensive as the natural brown sugar, people ought to buy it much less than they do now. For example; Buying fruits; apple, banana, and grapes would cause a bill of 600$ but on the other hand, a kilo of sugar and artificial flavor would make a bill of approximately 200$, so a person who earns lesser than the average sallery of a country will definitely buy the 200$'s package than a healthy food.

Moreover, childrens are the most vulnerable population towards this sugar, and making them understand the side effects is much harder so if the companies do not care about their consumers health maybe the markets should? for instance; instead of keeping chocolates and candies made with artificial means should be kept in the upper rows of the racks in a mart, so it would be easier for parents to control this. And the same industries can use original sweetners instead of white and artificial sugar and make their products a bit expensive to cover the production costs.

In conclusion, marking the price higher would surely makes the use of sugary items go significantly down, and it will also help with many health concerns caused by the use of higher sugar items.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position in favor of increasing the price of sugary products. The ideas are relevant, such as the economic comparison between healthy food and sugary snacks, and the focus on children as a vulnerable group. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The argument regarding the placement of products in supermarkets is a bit tangential to the core prompt about pricing. While the position is clear throughout, the explanation could be more nuanced to reach a higher band, as some points are slightly repetitive or lack depth in their justification.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central focus. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Although', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion', though some transitions feel a bit mechanical or slightly misused, such as the start of the second paragraph. Referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved to make the connections between ideas more seamless. Overall, the structure is coherent and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'vulnerable population' and 'economically high', though some word choices are slightly unnatural or imprecise, such as 'artificial means' or 'original sweetners'. Spelling errors like 'sallery' and 'childrens' are present, and there are minor issues with punctuation and capitalization. While the range is sufficient to convey the message, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('it genuinely cause', 'surely makes the use... go'), incorrect pluralization ('childrens'), and punctuation errors (misuse of semicolons and commas). While these errors do not impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and refining the use of complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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