Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In recent years, sugary products become very popular in young generation because the taste of this kind of food and drink easily attract people and they regularly eat this product in their daily life, but this products are not good for human's health. I totally agree with this view because it cause many problems such as obesity and high sugar level in the body, so if sugary products become more expensive, some people consume less sugar.
On the one hand, there are many disadvantages of consuming sugary items. Firstly, sugar level of human body become high if they eat this kind of products regularly in their daily life. For example, nowadays cold drinks are most consumable drink especially young generation, but it contain high level of sugar and it cause health related problem in young ones. Secondly, people often eat sugar cake on their birthday or anniversary but consume too much cake cause some problem in body such as diabetes of people body become high easily.
On the other hand, too overcome this problems sugary products should be made expensive so it helps to encourage people to consume less sugar. Also, government should conduct awareness programs to spread how sugary products badly affected their body. Furthermore, nowadays people become aware to less consume this kind product from saw the influencer videos on social media. For example, there are many fitness influencer regularly post photos and videos of how maintain body and avoid sugary products.
In conclusion, there are many problems cause such as obesity and high sugar level, if people drink and eat sugary products regularly. to overcome this problem made more expensive is affective way to encourage people to consume less sugar.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention health problems like obesity and diabetes, the explanation of why price increases would be an effective deterrent is underdeveloped. The argument relies on general statements rather than deeper analysis or nuanced reasoning. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the causal link between price and consumption, perhaps discussing the economic impact or the potential for government subsidies on healthier alternatives. The response covers all parts of the task, but the supporting arguments lack the depth required for a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear (e.g., 'this products' instead of 'these products'). The progression of ideas is generally easy to follow, but the transitions between paragraphs could be smoother to create a more cohesive argument. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs needs more variety to avoid a repetitive feel.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision expected at higher levels. You rely on basic terms like 'popular', 'good', and 'badly affected'. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'sugar level of human body become high' and 'consume too much cake cause some problem'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of more sophisticated or academic vocabulary limits the score. To improve, focus on using more precise terminology related to health and economics, and ensure that word forms are used correctly in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('sugary products become', 'it contain'), article usage, and pluralization ('young generation' should be 'the younger generation'). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your point, they are persistent throughout the text. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring consistent verb tenses. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures while maintaining accuracy will also help raise your score in this criterion.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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