Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
in present day , some food and drink companies contain large level of sugar in the product while these the is cause for many individuals health problem , furthermore, sugar products are more expensive to people buy less high sugar products for price is so high for sugar products . in my prospective sugar products is expensive is right decision because many people eat and drink large sugar products . ithe solution of few problem such as diabtes and people purchased healthy products . but other think that is negative development
commencing with the my opinion i think that goverment should increase sugar products rates because in my country many people faces many problem with direct linked of sugar beacuse in my country citizens most eat high sugar products and also made him own house and faces more diagnose related to sugar like daibtites and many problem . i thin is the solution of problems because sugar products is high and people do not purchased easily and his eat high sugar habit is removed easily to this method and people purchased healthy products and is benefit for made healthy products because his sale is increase
on the other hand , other people think that sugar price not high because in own country most people addicted tp eat large consuming sugar products . other people think that rapidly increase price for sugar , its affect on people who eat high sugar
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear opinion, but the development of ideas is limited and repetitive. The arguments regarding health benefits and government intervention are mentioned but lack depth or logical progression. Furthermore, the response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the ability to fully develop the response. The conclusion is abrupt and does not effectively summarize the main points. To improve, you should aim to expand on your reasoning with more specific examples and ensure you meet the length requirement to allow for a more comprehensive discussion of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear structure. While there is an attempt at paragraphing, the transitions between ideas are often mechanical or confusing, such as 'commencing with the my opinion'. The use of cohesive devices is limited and often inaccurate, which makes the flow of the argument difficult to follow. Referencing is frequently unclear, and the lack of logical progression between sentences hinders the overall coherence of the text. To improve, focus on using a wider range of linking words correctly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus that supports your main argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is basic and often repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice and collocation. For example, 'large level of sugar' and 'made him own house' are unnatural and impede clarity. There is little evidence of an attempt to use less common or more precise vocabulary. Many phrases are used incorrectly, such as 'direct linked of sugar', which suggests a limited range of expression. To improve, focus on learning collocations—words that naturally go together—and try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to health and economics to demonstrate a wider range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often make the meaning difficult to discern. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, such as 'in my country citizens most eat high sugar products and also made him own house'. The range of structures is very limited, relying mostly on simple sentences with poor control over complex forms. Punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of prepositions and articles.
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