Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is extensively ackowledged that numerous packet food conatins plethora amount of sugar which is harmful for our bodu.It believed that if price of suagar products ought to be increased to decrease the consumption.I totally believe with the given notion and reason for my inclination will be glanced in ensuing paragraphs.
To commence with, sugar is important for our body but, if it consumed in excessive amount if will shows negative impact on our body.To explicate,every thing effect us if it done in large amount even studies and sports.Moreover, according to doctors they admire only 25% sugar in any industry food if any packet contain more than that recommended than it may be dangerous.For instance, a survey was conducted in 2025 by goverment of America to examine the manufacturing process how much sugar is contained by food products and they illustrates oveall every packet contain 30% to 35% sweet in their products.Hence,we need to check all the items before eating.
Furthermore, it believed that if the expenses of sugar will be surged then the sales of sugar plummet and then society become more physically fit.To elaborate,the expansion of prices may be decrease the sales gradually however, the wealthy and affluent individuals who are addicted to it they does not effect.For example,in China the price of snacks were rose moderately in 2024 to motivate community towards the physical fitness unfortunately rich people did not motivated they did not stop eating snacks.Thus, each people and individual have to be more concerned about their own health.
Agglomerating aforementioned points it can be concluded that sugar is detrimental if it consemed over and demographics should be awared about the their health.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position on the taxation of sugary products. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you provide a rationale for your agreement, the supporting arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the example regarding China in 2024 is relevant but lacks a clear connection to how the government should proceed, as you conclude that individuals must take personal responsibility, which slightly undermines your initial argument for price intervention. To improve, ensure that your supporting examples directly reinforce your thesis throughout the entire essay.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural. Additionally, there are issues with referencing and sentence-level flow; for example, the transition between the health impact of sugar and the economic argument is abrupt. The concluding sentence is also quite weak and does not effectively summarize the main points discussed in the body paragraphs. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words will help the flow of your arguments.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'ackowledged', 'conatins', 'bodu', 'suagar', 'consemed') and some awkward collocations (e.g., 'plethora amount', 'industry food', 'sweet' used as a noun). While you attempt to use more sophisticated vocabulary like 'detrimental', 'affluent', and 'plummet', the overall control is inconsistent. To reach a higher band, you should focus on accurate spelling and using words in their correct grammatical context. Expanding your range of topic-specific vocabulary related to public health and economics would also be beneficial.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'every thing effect us', 'rich people did not motivated'), missing articles, and incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'if it consumed', 'price of snacks were rose'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several missing spaces after periods. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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