Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays most of the manufactured food and drink contain extensive sugar which is detrimental for our health. It is often argued that, sugary products should be more expensive to discourage people from consuming sugar. I partially agree with the view because raising social awareness and doing physical exercise is also important.

By making sugary products extensive government can reduce the consumption because it will lead people to avoid buying these products. If they consume less sugar it will keep them safe from different diseases such as diabetes and obesity. For example, German government implemented high tax on sugary products because of the rise of diabetic patients. After implementing high tax the number of diabetic patients reduced significantly.

However, only rising the price of sugary products can not prevent sugar consumption because those who could afford these products they will buy these products. Raising social awareness by organizing different health campaigns in schools or public places can also play an important role in this regard because it helps people to understand how these products are harming our health. My grandmother stopped taking sugar in tea after a man consulted her about the demerits of sugar. Moreover, government can run advertisement on TV showing the other alternatives of sugar which are not detrimental for people so that people can use them. Furthermore, people can encourage others to do physical exercises which is rewarding for their health and body.

To sum up, increasing the price of sugary products can not decrease sugar consumption alone because social awareness, and doing physical exercise is also important for individuals so that people can have a healthy life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed all parts of the task by providing a clear position and supporting it with relevant arguments. Your introduction establishes a partial agreement, and the body paragraphs explore both the economic approach (taxation) and alternative solutions (awareness and exercise). The example regarding the German government is relevant, though it could be more specific regarding the actual policy. To reach a higher band, ensure that your arguments are fully developed; for instance, you mention that awareness campaigns are effective, but you could elaborate on why this is a more sustainable long-term solution than taxation. Overall, your response is well-focused and directly answers the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a central theme, and you use cohesive devices such as 'However', 'Moreover', and 'To sum up' to link your points effectively. While the flow is generally good, some transitions feel slightly mechanical. For example, the shift between the economic argument and the awareness argument is clear, but the internal structure of the paragraphs could be improved by using more varied linking phrases. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the overall structure supports the development of your argument well.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'detrimental for our health' and 'reduce the consumption' are used accurately. However, there are some minor issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'making sugary products extensive' (which should be 'expensive') and 'run advertisement' (which should be 'run advertisements'). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and topic-specific terminology related to public health policy. Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, but lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is always clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'most of the manufactured food and drink contain' (should be 'contains'), 'only rising the price' (should be 'raising'), and 'those who could afford these products they will buy' (redundant pronoun). These errors do not impede communication, but they do occur regularly. To achieve a higher score, focus on subject-verb agreement and avoiding redundant pronouns. Increasing the variety of complex structures while maintaining accuracy will also help elevate your score.

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