Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

numerous make Suger things contain Big levels of suger , which create produce unaccountable health issues. when suger things have much costly then person will consume less suger things . I partially agree with this statement. In upcoming paragraphs I will discuss why i am partially agree with this statement .

To begin with, when suger products price is very high then citizen can not buy things as a results citizen have more benfits. firstly they have no health issues , their body can not convert into fatty body , and they feel relax when they can not uses suger products . according to survey in India, 70% person have no diseases because they can not uses suger during 2026.When person eat more and more sweet things Then liver iss convert into fatty liver and fatty liver can not do work properly as results few years ago person have more health issues .

However, When manufaturers should incresed price of suger products then people can not buy things and manufaturer will become into loss . productions of suger things are stop. workers are lost their jobs For example , In Canada production Owner increase price on sugar thing after few time people can not buy suger things and production of thing wiil be stop and unaccounttable citizen lost there jobs and the price of doller is low in other countries during 2026. .

conclusion, There are some benfits and unbenfits of sugar products but benfits are overweight on unbenfits

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the impact of sugar taxes, but the development is limited and often unclear. The position is stated as 'partially agree', but the arguments are repetitive and lack logical depth. The examples provided, such as the reference to India in 2026 or the economic impact in Canada, are vague and lack factual grounding, which hinders the persuasiveness of the argument. Furthermore, the response is slightly under the 250-word minimum, which negatively impacts the overall task completion. To improve, you should focus on providing clear, well-supported arguments that directly address the social and economic implications of the proposal rather than relying on unsupported claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow of ideas is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and a lack of logical progression. While some cohesive devices like 'To begin with' and 'However' are used, they are often followed by sentences that do not logically connect to the previous point. The conclusion is extremely brief and fails to effectively summarise the main points of the essay. Referencing is often unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the argument. Improving the use of transition words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, with frequent misuse of basic terms. For instance, 'suger things' is used repeatedly instead of more precise terms like 'sugary products' or 'confectionery'. There are also significant spelling errors, such as 'manufaturer', 'incresed', and 'benfits', which occur throughout the text. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas clearly, and the word choice is often informal or inaccurate. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to health and economics and practice using these words in appropriate contexts.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'person will consume', 'liver iss convert'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, making them difficult to parse. The range of grammatical structures is very narrow, relying mostly on simple sentences with little evidence of complex sentence control. To improve, you must focus on basic sentence construction, correct verb tenses, and proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect pluralisation. Consistent practice with basic grammar rules is essential before attempting more complex structures.

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