Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Some people suggest to increase the price of the products containing high level of sugar to encourage people to consume less sugar. I completely disagree with the statement and in this essay, i will put my points and suggest some alternatives.
White sugar can cause many health issues and it is mainly responsible for dibatices. However, nowdays people all over the world are being health conssices and start avoiding sugar. But increasing the price of the products containing high level of sugar is not the right solution. Because it will just make it the product unaffordable for the middle class people. Moreover, people can treat it as a high value products, thinking more money means more benifits.
Reather then increasing the price goverments should
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under the required word count of 250 words, reaching only 124 words. Because the essay is incomplete and stops mid-sentence, the task is only partially addressed. While a clear position is stated in the introduction, the ideas are not developed or supported with sufficient detail. The failure to meet the minimum length requirement is a major constraint that prevents the development of a coherent argument, resulting in a low score for this criterion.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay is too short to demonstrate effective paragraphing or a logical progression of ideas. While there is a basic attempt to structure the introduction and a body paragraph, the abrupt ending makes it impossible to assess the overall coherence. Cohesive devices are minimal, and the lack of a conclusion or a fully developed argument means the text does not flow as a cohesive piece of writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and contains several spelling errors, such as 'dibatices' (diabetes), 'nowdays' (nowadays), 'conssices' (conscious), 'benifits' (benefits), and 'reather' (rather). The range of vocabulary is basic and insufficient to discuss the topic in an academic manner. There is little evidence of the ability to use less common lexical items or precise collocations, which limits the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors, such as 'suggest to increase' (suggest increasing), 'it is mainly responsible for' (it is a primary cause of), and 'treat it as a high value products' (treat them as high-value products). The sentence structures are simple and repetitive. The lack of control over basic grammar and punctuation, combined with the incomplete nature of the text, indicates a limited range of structures and frequent errors.
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