Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Food and drink products produced in factories contain high levels of sugar which has a huge contribution to health casualties in people nowadays. I agree with the idea of raising the price of sugary products so that people would consume less sugar because easy affordability will indeed increase their consumption while some of the people may consume it despite of its price in case they are able to afford it.

The reason for my agreement with the statement is because many people would not be able to afford sugary products in case their prices are raised by a considerable amount. Sugary products like chocolates, cake, soft drinks and beverages are consumed by a huge proportion of population in the world. These items are the causes, many faces health issues like diabetes, obesity and heart diseases. When their prices are increased abruptly, normal people would opt for cheaper options which might be healthier.

On the other hand, I think that raising the prices will not turn out to be the best strategy to lower such products consumption because the richer ones who are able to afford it will continue consuming it irrespective of the price hike. Additionally, some poor ones who are fond of cakes and chocolates may commit theft or robbery to be able to get them.

In conclusion, I would like to mention that I agree to some extent that price hike for sugary products will lower their consumption while it is not the best measure to perform for the purpose of discouraging public to consume less sugar.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position, though the development of ideas is somewhat limited. You acknowledge both sides of the argument, which is good, but the reasoning is occasionally simplistic. For instance, the claim that people might 'commit theft or robbery' to buy sugary products is an extreme and unsupported assertion that detracts from the academic tone. To improve, focus on providing more nuanced, realistic arguments, such as the impact on low-income families or the effectiveness of alternative health education programs, rather than relying on hyperbolic scenarios. The conclusion is clear, but the overall argument could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use basic cohesive devices like 'On the other hand' and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing could be more sophisticated. For example, in the second paragraph, the transition between the health risks and the price hike could be smoother. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a strong topic sentence that clearly connects back to your central thesis.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'abruptly', 'consumption', and 'strategy'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'health casualties' is not the standard term for health problems, and 'the richer ones' is slightly informal. Additionally, the phrase 'measure to perform' is awkward. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoid informal phrasing. Expanding your vocabulary to include more topic-specific terminology related to public health and economics would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally affect the clarity of your writing. For example, 'despite of its price' is incorrect (it should be 'despite its price' or 'in spite of its price'). There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases, such as 'the causes, many faces health issues'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to limit your score. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and common prepositional errors to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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