Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Healthy meals are essential part of our daily life. It must contain ingredients that plays crucial role to maintain health in the long run of life. The high level of sugar containing ingredients should be avoided because it may cause severe health problems. Due to this, sugary products should be made expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. In this essay, I will discuss about my opinion regarding this statement and draw the conclusion.

There are several health problems due to the excessive use of sugary products. Firstly, diabetes is common disease everyone becomes a victim of this. One of major cause of this disease is meals containing high sugar. If sugar level is not controlled then it would become fatal. Secondly, obesity is becoming increasingly popular among young people. The major cause of this disease is also consuming junk food that contains high content of sugar and artificial flavors. In addition, there are also various other diseases like swollen lymph nodes that all results in high sugar level in blood.

To overcome these health problems, the government should implement following interventions. Government should start a campaign or advertising people regarding this problem. The purpose of this campaign is developing awareness among youth to avoid large intake of fast food.

I wholeheartedly agree with this statement of sugary products should be made more expensive. The reason is specifically middle class of our society abstain to buy these things and will be saved from harmful consequences of health.

In conclusion, a balance approach should be needed to maintain a healthier environment in future. Although high sugar contents can cause severe health issues, it is beneficial at some certain limit.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention health issues like diabetes and obesity, the explanation of why taxation is the best solution is underdeveloped. The argument regarding the 'middle class' is a good start but lacks depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that each body paragraph provides a more thorough explanation and a concrete example to support your claims. The conclusion is slightly contradictory, as you suggest a 'balanced approach' after arguing strongly for taxation, which weakens the clarity of your overall stance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In addition' to link your points. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and some transitions feel abrupt. The use of referencing is occasionally unclear; for example, in the second paragraph, 'everyone becomes a victim of this' is vague. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would help improve the overall cohesion of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on repetitive phrasing, such as 'major cause of this disease' and 'high level of sugar'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'obesity is becoming increasingly popular', where 'prevalent' or 'widespread' would be more appropriate. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to public health policy and economics, and focus on using more natural collocations to convey your ideas with greater sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include article usage ('an essential part', 'a balanced approach'), subject-verb agreement ('ingredients that plays'), and awkward phrasing ('advertising people regarding this problem'). While your meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and ensuring that articles and prepositions are used correctly in your sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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