Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

As we move into the 21st century, manufactured food and drinks contain excessive amount of which can lead to several health problems. some people therefor argue that sugary product made more expensive to discourage people to consuming them. I strongly agree with this viewpoint and this essay will discuss my preference with relevant reasons and examples.

To begin with, increasing the price of sugary products can discourage people from buying them regularity. When unhealthy food becomes more expensive, consumers may reconsider their purchasing habits and choose product with less sugar. This is particularly effective for young generations, who may have limited spending money. For example, Mexico introduce a tax on sugary drinks, and this policy was associated with purchases of these beverages.

Furthermore, higher price can encourage people to adopt healthier lifestyles and reduce the risk of health problems related to excessive sugar consumption. If sugary products are consumed less frequently, people may have a lower risk of obesity and other diet-related illnesses. For instance, in the United Kingdom, a levy on sugary drinks encouraged manufacturers to reduce the amount of sugar in their products.

However, making sugary products more expensive could place an additional financial burden families who live under the poverty line. Some individuals may still buy these products despite higher prices because they are affordable or convenient compared with healthier options. Nevertheless, governments can use the revenue from sugar taxes to subsidise healthy food and fund public health programmes. This would make the policy fairer and more effective.

In conclusion, I strongly agree that sugary food and drinks should be made more expensive. Although this policy may create some financial difficulties for low-income consumers, it can reduce sugar consumption, encourage healthier choices and improve public health.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have clearly addressed the prompt and maintained a consistent position throughout the essay. The ideas are relevant and supported by specific examples, such as the sugar tax in Mexico and the UK levy. The response is well-structured, covering both the benefits of the policy and a counter-argument regarding low-income families. To reach a higher band, ensure that all ideas are fully extended; for instance, the point about young generations could be further elaborated with a specific consequence of their limited budget. Overall, you have fulfilled all requirements of the task effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'Nevertheless' to guide the reader through your arguments. However, there are minor issues with cohesion, such as the missing subject in the first paragraph ('sugary product made more expensive') and some awkward phrasing that slightly disrupts the flow. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the progression of ideas is generally clear. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would help achieve a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'excessive,' 'subsidise,' and 'diet-related illnesses.' However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and missing words, such as 'excessive amount of which' (missing the noun 'sugar') and 'purchases of these beverages' (which is vague). You attempt to use less common vocabulary, but some collocations are slightly unnatural. To improve, focus on using more precise terminology and ensuring that your word choices are grammatically integrated into your sentences.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you successfully use complex sentences to express your ideas, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('in United Kingdom'), subject-verb agreement issues ('Mexico introduce'), and incomplete sentence structures ('sugary product made more expensive'). These errors do not impede communication, but they are noticeable. To move up, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly regarding verb tenses and article usage, and try to incorporate a wider variety of error-free complex structures.

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