Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
Generally many of the manufactured food and drink items are full with high levels of sugar, which contain many disease which cause serious health problems. As now people eating too much sugar containing products in our daily life, which cause health issue. Some person does not take care which he was eating all the time. All the things which are made by sugar and small amount of its particle are added to the product which could be by adding the sugar in it. It makes this thing more beautiful and looks very pretty. But the humans also buying this items on high rate they do care of their health issue that this thing cause disease in it. Things made with the sucrose are much expensive to buy it at high cost. But some people buy it at any cost wether it was cheap or expensive. They take it and went to the home where they sit to eat this buying product with there family also. Actually, they buy a health causing items for their family. It was important to reduce the production of which was made by the sucrose. That,s why it can be minimize for the better life of indiviuals. Generally it was not good for life. In some point of views, it was a big source of income as well as it grow on the industrial scale. When it was disagree it the on the industrial scale and low the annual budget also
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to fully address the prompt. While you mention the health risks of sugar, you do not clearly state your position on whether sugary products should be made more expensive. The ideas are underdeveloped and lack logical progression. Furthermore, the response is under the 250-word minimum, which negatively impacts the task achievement score. To improve, ensure you clearly state your opinion in the introduction and provide specific, well-supported arguments for each paragraph, ensuring you meet the required word count.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay lacks clear paragraphing and logical flow. Ideas are presented in a disjointed manner, making it difficult for the reader to follow your argument. There is a lack of cohesive devices (such as 'however', 'consequently', or 'furthermore') to link sentences and ideas together. The transition between discussing health issues and the economic impact of sugar production is abrupt and confusing. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and employ linking words to connect your thoughts logically.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You frequently use basic terms like 'things' or 'items' instead of more precise academic language. There are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'full with high levels of sugar' (should be 'full of') and 'health causing items' (should be 'unhealthy products'). The use of 'sucrose' is technically correct but feels out of place given the surrounding simple language. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations and synonyms will significantly improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Some person does not take care'), tense consistency (e.g., 'he was eating'), and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on, making the text difficult to parse. There is a very limited range of complex structures, and the attempts at them are often faulty. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement and tense consistency is essential for improvement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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